<!DOCTYPE html>
<html>
<head>
<meta charset="UTF-8">
<title>Non-Definitive Acts by samwellsgays</title>
<style type="text/css">

body { background-color: #ffffff; }
.CI {
text-align:center;
margin-top:0px;
margin-bottom:0px;
padding:0px;
}
.center   {text-align: center;}
.cover    {text-align: center;}
.full     {width: 100%; }
.quarter  {width: 25%; }
.smcap    {font-variant: small-caps;}
.u        {text-decoration: underline;}
.bold     {font-weight: bold;}
</style>
</head>
<body>
<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25570960">Non-Definitive Acts</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/samwellsgays/pseuds/samwellsgays'>samwellsgays</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Check Please! (Webcomic)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>M/M, Themes of addiction in later chapters, also this definitely references that chapter that is only in the physical copy or on patreon, i love kent parson you can't stop me, so deal with that too, this is very gay</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-07-28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-09-17</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-05 02:29:31</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>24,570</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25570960</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/samwellsgays/pseuds/samwellsgays</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Sometimes you get everything you could ever want, and sometimes you forget to add "be happy" to that list.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Alexei "Tater" Mashkov/Kent "Parse" Parson, Derek "Nursey" Nurse/William "Dex" Poindexter, Eric "Bitty" Bittle/Jack Zimmermann</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>26</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>117</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter One</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Hi ahhh this is my first fanfic in a LONG time but. I have been yearning and thinking about Kent for a long time and this is maybe the only way to make it stop. </p><p>Maybe I'm making it worse. Who knows. This boy deserves a better ending and goddamnit I'm going to give it to him. </p><p>Anyway, I posted a thing on my tumblr relating a Richard Siken poem to Kent, and then I made a playlist where I reordered Folklore to fit his narrative so there was only one thing left to do. </p><p>This is half finished! I've written about six chapters, so I'll hopefully be able to post regularly. And I promise I'll finish this one. </p><p>Thank u Alaina for helping me edit this &lt;3 i love u</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Kent dropped his keys on the counter beside the door as he walked into his hotel room. He’d just gotten a trinket bowl for his apartment a week ago, a gift from Swoops after the sheer number of times he had lost his keys by dropping them in random spots around his place. That bowl was new, still in that stage where he had to actively remember it was there so he was trying not to forget even while they were on the road. Routine was good.</p><p>The bowl was small and white ceramic with a lining of silver around the edge, simple enough to fit into his apartment but still a little flashy and nice to look at. Most of the team still made fun of him for having a half-furnished apartment, and maybe they had a point. He had more money than he’d ever seen and he still hadn’t gotten a real set of pots and pans or a bed frame for his spare room. He got one of those internet mattresses when he first moved in, and it had just been sitting there for years now. Sometimes his sister would sleep on it when she came over, but he never really had anyone else visit so he didn’t see the point.</p><p>He took off his shoes and dropped his bag, walking to the bed in the centre of the room and just flopping back down onto it.</p><p>Kent knew it was a cliche at this point. Everyone talked about his love for his cat, but in that moment, the way his chest ached, he couldn’t miss her more. He unlocked his phone and scrolled through a few videos he’d taken over the past week, letting out the breath he felt like he’d been holding the entire drive home.</p><p>He was glad he did it. It hurt and it wasn’t what he was looking for, but he was glad he went to the weird southern frat house. He was just meaning to say good luck, really. He wasn’t looking for anything else. It wasn’t a mistake and it wasn’t just some impulsive decision, really, the invite had been sitting in his mailbox for a week and he knew this was what his therapist had been talking about. Closure.</p><p>Of course, if he let them know that he’d be around if they needed any help and he ended up having Bittle and Zimms as friends, that wouldn’t hurt either right? Naturally, he’d never know. But still. Closure.</p><p>He was looking at a picture of Kit sitting perfectly in one of the sunbeams on the floor of his apartment when his phone buzzed and the notification slid down giving him a warning that the boys were coming to his room. He knew this was happening, he had told Scraps to invite everyone as they drove back from Samwell, but he had hoped he’d have more time to relax first. He managed to wash his face quickly in the sink, and just as he was pulling his sweats on, there was a knock at the door. He took a deep breath before tucking his jeans into his bag and letting the team in.</p><p>If you asked him now he still wouldn’t be sure where that time went between opening the door to shouts of “pie!” and the huddle of men laying on the hotel room bed, pie plates scattered around them and crumbs all through the sheets. But as he shared a grin with Swoops and they split the last bite of pie from the tray that was laying on his chest, he couldn’t bring himself to mind. Tonight wasn’t a night to mope about, it was the start of a new Kent Parson.</p><p>A Kent Parson who doesn’t care that Jack still doesn’t return his messages or emails. A Kent Parson who is okay with the fact that some kid he barely knows has decided it’s his business what happens between him and Jack Zimmermann. A Kent Parson who eats pie and laughs with his friends and forgives himself.</p><p>Swoops raised an eyebrow in his usual question; <em>Is everything okay?</em> And Kent just nodded slightly, moving his head just enough that the crown rested against his friend’s shoulder.</p><p>He must’ve fallen asleep there, hearing quiet murmurs as the bed shifted and everything came into focus once more, the boys all standing up and helping each other get the crumbs off the bed. They weren’t even flicking them onto the floor either, carefully brushing them into the palm of their hands and then dusting off over the wastebasket that the hotel provided.</p><p>“Turning in so soon?” Kent asked, pushing himself up on his elbows as he tried to act like he had been awake the whole time even though it was pointless.</p><p>“What did you think, Parser, we were all going to sleep together? We’re not the Fal-” Carly stopped abruptly as Swoops, Scraps, and one of the rookies all stood up, saying nothing but almost daring him to finish his sentence. He shook his head and walked out of the room, muttering something under his breath that Kent didn’t want to hear.</p><p>“Yeah that’s right.” Scraps sighed heavily, and Kent was thankful for their presence. After Jack came out, and inevitably all of the articles about Kent had followed, they had gone through all kinds of sensitivity training, and though it was good for the most part, some of the older guys still seemed to think that it only applied outside the locker rooms and team hangs. Old prejudices die hard or something like that. None of the older guys were there to add to his bullshit though, which he was grateful for. They all had to Skype their families or fall asleep early or something.</p><p>“Jesus, why do they even need to voice that kind of shit, who’s even benefiting from that?” Kent said before he could stop himself, the anger still holding tight in his chest. Maybe it wasn’t an entirely new Kent Parson, but it was something close to it.</p><p>“Who knows man, but they’re gonna be too old to play soon enough, if all goes according to plan.” Swoops bumped Scraps’ shoulder and moved the pie plates to the tiny kitchen sink, not putting a whole lot of effort into washing them but rinsing them off enough that they wouldn’t be sticky in the morning.</p><p>“You sound like you’ve got a hit out or something, is there something you're not telling us?” He laughed, the knot of anger quickly dissipating at their support, even if it wasn’t directed at him at all.</p><p>“I don’t, but that might not be a bad idea…” Jeff had a mischievous glint in his eye that made Scraps laugh, and the few other players who were still hanging around seemed unsure whether they should laugh too or not.</p><p>“As Captain, all I can say is that” he cleared his throat, slipping into the voice he used for pressers as he stepped up to stand on the bed, “we here on the Aces support everyone who wants to play hockey, regardless of gender or sexuality, and I for one, would love to see a more diverse future for the NHL.” He was sure his grin at the end gave it away, but he flopped back onto the bed regardless.</p><p>“Thanks Cap” Scraps mock-saluted him, picking up the hoodie that he took off at some point as the others made to leave the room. “See you in the morning?”</p><p>They all filed out slowly, Swoops naturally staying behind to get the full extent of what happened on their little trip.</p><p>“So you’re sure you’re over it now? No more feelings for Zimmermann?” He asked when Kent finished his story. He didn’t share much other than the facts, not sure what his feelings even were yet.</p><p>“Shit Jeff, I haven’t had feelings for him in a long time. It’s just… you know.” He busied himself by getting up and digging out the kettle he brought to hotels with him, he’d read too many articles to even think about using the one stored away in the cupboard.</p><p>“Yeah, I know. There’s only so much you can carry on your shoulders, man. You’ve done what you can and if he doesn’t even have the decency to talk to you himself then you know it’s time.”</p><p>“You’re right. And I think it is time. I feel good.” He held up the kettle in a silent question and filled it at Jeff’s nod, pulling out two mugs and two teabags. “Now you’ve just got to get yourself a little blond thing like he has.”</p><p>“Brah, I <em>am</em> the little blond thing. I need a tall drink of water.”</p><p>“Shame you’re making tea.”</p><p>They watched It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia with the hotel dvd player, and as Kent drifted off thinking about Rob McElhenney sweeping him off his feet, he didn’t even see the notification of Eric Bittle following him on instagram.</p><p> </p><p>_________________________</p><p> </p><p>To his credit, Kent actually did forget about Jack, and Eric too for that matter. They made it through the season and even though they didn’t make it past the third round of the playoffs, he was feeling pretty good.</p><p>Of course, nothing can be good for Kent for too long.</p><p>He was checking his mail on a Tuesday afternoon when he saw an envelope that stuck out from the others. Not the usual bills, or more bills, he had a momentary panic that someone had sent fan mail to his house. The envelope was an eggshell colour, with gold around the edges and tidy cursive handwriting spelling out his name. He flipped it over to see the return address and his heart sunk to his feet.</p><p>The address itself was nothing special, but he knew what it meant to see Providence, RI stamped on something addressed to him. He dropped his keys in the trinket bowl, and hung his coat up on a hook on the other side of the doorway, sliding his finger under the seal and pulling out a card once he tore through the layer of paper. He had to call Swoops.</p><p>“An engagement? Jesus Christ they move fast.” He was glad that Jeff could read him that well through the phone, because he’d driven over immediately and was now pacing his living room, Kit following him diligently wanting attention.</p><p>“I guess it makes sense, he was never one to do things by halves.” Kent was just wondering why he was invited to the party.</p><p>“But why did they invite you to the party?” Swoops asked at the same time that he thought it, which, <em>wow</em> <em>okay,</em> maybe they spent too much time together. “Not in a bad way of course, you’d be a delight to have as a guest, but I mean didn’t you say that Bittle essentially told you to fuck off forever?”</p><p>“Maybe he changed his mind?”</p><p>“Maybe Jack still has the hots for you and wants to give it one last chance.” “I’m too good for him.”</p><p>“You are.”</p><p>They grinned at each other because for once, Kent said that and believed it.</p><p>“But what do I do? If I don’t go that’s making a statement, and if I do go…”</p><p>“It could be a total disaster. I get it.” Swoops stopped pacing and sat on the couch next to Kent, letting Kit jump up into his lap and immediately giving her the attention she demanded. They were silent in thought for a moment before Swoops looked up. “Hand me the invitation?”</p><p>Kent didn’t know what the point was, but he reached over the arm of the couch to where it was sitting on the side table and handed it behind him.</p><p>“Aha! They say you can have a plus one!” “And? I’m horrendously alone save Mark from Grindr last week.” Kent grimaced but tried to laugh through it.</p><p>“Bring me. I’ll be your boy toy for the night.”</p><p>“Yeah, okay sure. I’ll check if Mark’s free that night and you guys can tag team.” He laughed, reaching out to stroke the top of Kit’s head where Jeff was scratching behind her ear.</p><p>“Kent.” There was something in his best friend’s voice that made him stop and look up. “I’m serious, I’ll come. I don’t have to be your boyfriend but I will be if that makes it easier to tell people. I’ll be there, and we can leave if it’s at all bad.”</p><p>“Oh. That actually sounds pretty great.” Kent’s brow furrowed, his brain still trying to come up with ways it could go horribly wrong, but knowing that Swoops would be there made the end results feel much less drastic. “Thanks.” He bumped his forehead against the other man’s shoulder.</p><p>“I’ve got your back, always.”</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Chapter Two</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I will just say that I do not know the logistics of all of this travel, but personally I think that is Ngozi's fault for putting Kent on the other side of the country. (i'm kidding please don't come for me) </p><p>anyway! enjoy :-)</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>“This is a bad idea. We should turn around now. Back out before anyone sees us. I can just say something came up.” Kent stepped out of the Uber and spun the small wrapped box around in his hands, a set of embroidered tea towels that he ordered online. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“We’re doing this. You’re going to regret it if you don’t Kent.” Jeff put his hand in the middle of Kent’s shoulder blades, rubbing a small circle gently to calm him. They were wearing matching black suits, Kent’s tie matching the trim of Jeff’s suit and vice versa. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Okay, but if you want to leave at any point you’ll tell me right?” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Of course, and you’ll tell me? We don’t have to stay long.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>They shared a small smile and Kent led them down the side path to the house, following the instructions left as they passed the security guard standing at the entrance to the party. He was dressed in plain clothes but wasn’t particularly subtle standing there. Kent figured it might’ve been one of the players from their college hockey team, but he couldn’t be sure. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The house didn’t belong to Zimmermann, but their friends from Samwell. He knew that Jack had an apartment and this place was in Boston, which honestly made it all much easier to find a hotel. One of the perks of being a hotshot hockey player he supposed. They could go anywhere whenever they wanted as long as it matched up with their schedule and PR approved. Swoops laced their fingers together to pull Kent out of the weird mental spiral he’d fallen into, and he dropped the gift onto the table with the others. Almost immediately they had champagne flutes in hand. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Who knew Zimmermann could be this fancy.” Swoops let out a low whistle as they took in the large landscaped backyard with tables and string lights, each table with a light blue or maroon runner and drinks and hors d'oeuvres. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“It’s not Zimms, it’s the fiancé.” Kent laughed with almost no humour behind it, still not sure what to make of the infamous baker he had been secretly buying pies from or the fact that Jack was still Zimms in his mind. “You’ll understand when you meet him, if we find them that is.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>They slowly made their way to the table of food, bumping into many different players and old teammates as they did so, making small talk and chatting aimlessly about the game. There was a point where Jeff got caught up talking to one of the Falconers who had been traded from the Aces before Kent had even joined the team, so he tapped his arm silently to let him know that he was going to keep moving, and managed to make it the whole way to getting a mini quiche in his mouth before he was accosted again. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He chewed quickly when he heard “Kent Parson!” Yelled from a small distance away, not wanting to seem rude. He swallowed it down with a swig of champagne as he turned to see who it was, the two big defensemen he met at Samwell grinning as they made their way over to him. If he was honest, he wasn’t sure what their names were, something like Alan and Jason? They had hockey nicknames too he knew that much, but the night that he met all of that team was still a blur. Partially because of the alcohol and partially because he just didn’t want to remember anymore. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hey guys!” He felt the mask slip down and settle on his face easily, turning on the charm as he shook their hands. “What’s up, how have you been? Still crushing it at pong?” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>They laughed, almost in unison. “Lardo’s around here somewhere! We might have to convince Jack to let us turn one of these classy tables into a game table for a rematch!” The tall blonde said, definitely much louder than at all necessary. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“We’ve been okay though, moved into this place after we graduated with some of the others from Samwell, and it's been good. Business is good too.” Kent was sure he was supposed to know which business it was, or at least he was sure he was supposed to have seen something about it on Instagram. Maybe he had. “Adam’s been bugging me about getting a cat after seeing all of your posts of Kit, but I think one more well-timed early morning sun picture of her will convince me.” Okay, Adam. That’s good. And Kit, something he was knowledgeable on. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Oh man, you guys have got to get a cat, Kit is really the light of my life. She can be a handful but she’s everything to me.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I heard ‘everything to you’? Talking about me again?” Kent felt rather than heard Jeff’s arrival behind him, a hand placed on his lower back and a low chuckle that reverberated through his body from that place as he swooped in to save him from floundering through the rest of the conversation. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You wish.” Kent grinned and rolled his eyes, leaning into the touch a little more and noting the way that their company’s eyes lit up at it. “I was talking about Kit, you menace.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Jeff laughed and introduced himself to the other guys, and Kent finally took note of their names and other aspects of their lives as they talked and the night just sort of continued on around them, the sun setting and the lanterns that he hadn’t noticed before lighting the entire area in a warm glow. He met more of the Samwell team he was sure he’d met previously, talked to new people from Eric and Jack’s life, tried to ignore that he was living in a world where there were people in Jack’s life that he’d never met before, and talked about a lot of hockey with a lot of people.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Somehow, as he swapped out his empty glass for a new full one, he realised he hadn’t even spoken to the couple of the night. He saw them of course, bouncing around, basking in the glow that only happiness can give a person, but he hadn’t said anything and neither had they. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Jeff?” Kent nudged him gently, letting his hand fall and lace their fingers together as he finished the drink in two swift pulls. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hm?” His friend and teammate turned out of the conversation that had seemed to reach a lull, turning to give Kent his full attention and squeezing his hand a little tighter. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“We haven’t spoken to Eric or Jack yet.” God, sometimes it was like Jeff could read his mind. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Do you want to?” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“We should.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Okay.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Jeff followed his lead as he kept their hands held together, walking the short distance across the yard to where the boys were getting their own drinks refilled. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hey! Sorry we didn’t want to bother you earlier but we just wanted to come over and say congratulations to you two!” Kent grinned, and both Jack and Eric smiled back, Jack’s eyes crinkled at the corners like they used to, even though there was a coldness behind Eric’s. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hey, we’re so glad you made it. Thanks.” Jack smiled at both of them, and Kent didn’t miss the way his eyes flickered down to where their hands were still clasped together. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Thanks for the invite, this whole place looks amazing. And the food is incredible.” Swoops was always good at carrying conversations when they got difficult, and obviously he’d said the right thing because Eric’s face lit up despite the rest of his demeanour. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yeah! Bits made all of the food, I still don’t know how he did it but he pulled it all together. Wouldn’t let me call a caterer. But I managed to convince him to let someone else take charge for the wedding.” Kent winced, but recovered quickly. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“It’s no big deal really, but thank you I’m glad you’re enjoying it all. The pies will come out soon I think, after the toasts.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Oh I can’t wait. Those pies you gave me last time I was at the Haus were to die for, we all polished them off as soon as we got back.” The tips of Eric’s ears went red and Jack’s brow furrowed, but they both smiled and nodded anyway. “Well, I’ll let you two get back to being wonderful hosts. I’m really happy for you.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>And with that, he turned and walked away, still clutching Jeff’s hand tightly and leading them to a more secluded part of the garden. The second they stopped walking Jeff pulled him in close, wrapping his arms around his shoulders and letting Kent rest his head on his chest. This was one of those moments where Kent was glad that his best friend was so much taller than he was, as his shaking hands came up to rest on his back and he pressed his forehead on the defined line between his pecs. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You did so well, Kent.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Thanks. I don’t know why they still affect me so much after all of these years. I’m fine and I’m over it but I look into his eyes and I’m a teenager again.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“But you’re not, and I’m so proud of you for knowing the difference. We can just sit here as long as you like, we can leave if you want.” Kent pulled back enough to look up at Jeff with a frown. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Do you really think we’re leaving before the pie comes out?” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You know we have to sit through speeches.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’ll do it. You remember how good that pie was.” Jeff just laughed. “I’m going to stay here for a bit, just calm down and cool off. You can go kanoodle.” He patted Swoops on the back and stepped backwards, wiping his hands on his jeans as he looked around at the part of the garden he hadn’t really paid any attention to earlier. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Okay. You know where to find me if you need anything.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yep.” Kent nodded and sat down on a small raised edge of the garden bed as he watched Jeff walk back into the hoard of people and start talking to one of the Samwell guys easily. His name was Nurse? Maybe? </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He wasn’t sure how long it was, but he still wasn’t feeling settled, so he snuck out the side gate and to the front of the house. There were a group of younger adults that he recognised from that last trip to try and repair his relationship with Jack and Eric, including one that he wasn’t supposed to know as well as he did.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hey, Tony? Can I steal a cigarette?” He took one and the dark blue lighter that was handed to him, and smiled as the group went back to the party. It took him a few tries to get it to spark properly, but he was able to light the cigarette with shaky hands. He didn’t usually smoke, and he knew that he would get in trouble from his trainers for this, but it was nothing compared to the ‘party days’ he used to have. Plus, it was giving him something to do, something to calm his nerves. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Smoking is bad for you.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Kent whipped his head around and then up when he heard the voice against him. “Mashkov. Why do you care?” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The taller man said nothing, just chuckled and plucked the cigarette from between Kent’s fingers. He took a drag and passed it back, ignoring the incredulous look he was being given. “I don’t care, little rat.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Kent shook his head and took a long drag, finishing the cigarette and putting it out on the sole of his shoe. He didn’t have the patience to argue with any of Jack’s goons right now. As he told his team over and over, do not engage. Obviously, Mashkov wasn't told the same thing. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You and Jeff Troy, huh? Would never have expected you to pick him for your boyfriend.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“He’s not my boyfriend.” Kent didn't know why he said it, or why he was feeling so defensive about it. There was something about Mashkov that just made it impossible to lie. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Oh? But--”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“He’s pretending, for me. Don’t tell anyone I just… I didn’t want to turn up alone. Or with a teammate like a loser.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I turned up alone.” Kent almost felt bad for what he said, but noticed a light twinkle in Mashkov’s eye. He knew when he was being teased.  </span>
  <span></span><br/>
<br/>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s different for you. I don’t… I don’t belong here like the rest of you, I’m not even sure why I was invited.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You were invited, no? Why is not important. Just have fun.” Mashkov smiled in a way that got under Kent’s skin. He smiled like there was nothing to worry about. “Now come on, there will be pie soon.” Alexei bumped his shoulder against Kent’s gently; though their height difference made it a bit awkward. They quietly headed back through to the yard side by side, but just before they reentered the party Mashkov stopped and clapped his hand down on Kent's shoulder, effectively stopping him as well. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Parson. I’m glad you are not Troy’s boyfriend.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He was gone, disappearing back into the fray before Kent could even really process what he had said. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The rest of the night passed without much fuss. It turned out Mashkov was right; both about the pie and the idea of having fun. They didn’t have a chance to play pong, mostly because Eric absolutely refused to let them make a mess, but they did do toasts and speeches, and a sneaky game of flip cup in the living room where Kent got his ass kicked. After another four champagnes he found himself socialising easily, leaning into Jeff’s side more and more and grinning at Eric and Jack without any real worry. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>As he climbed into the Uber alongside his best friend at the end of the night, he felt good. Better than he ever thought he could feel after seeing Jack. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Thanks Swoops.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Always.” </span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Chapter Three</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I don't know how often you guys want updates but i'm working on it!! </p>
<p>Also thank you for your comments so far I would love any feedback you have -- this chapter is a little longer but !! that's fun too</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>A few weeks went by with nothing particularly interesting happening. They were all still in the off-season, some training days were optional and some were mandatory but Kent was at them all. He had finally settled into his captaincy, no longer the scared and confused kid he had been. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>He was out for coffee with some of the guys, including Scraps, who he’d gotten a lot closer to in the last season, sharing pub nights and driving to Boston together. He was a good kid, even though he was probably the closest to Kent’s age on the team other than the newer recruits. God, he was getting old. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Everyone’s phone went off at the same time, the similar ‘ding’ sound ringing around the table in quick succession, and naturally as they all checked their message at the same time, they saw that Alexei Mashkov had invited all of the Aces and a few other teams to a “NHL bonding session” or so it said on the invite. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“It’s just going to be a massive rager, really.” Swoops told one of the younger guys, who tried not to look as excited as he clearly was. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Alright everyone, as your captain I have to tell you not to go or you risk endangering your contracts. But as your teammate I know that we’re all probably going to go anyway, so just be smart, count your drinks and don’t take any drugs. Be careful about who you hook up with and let PR know before you do anything. No social media, selfies are allowed but they are not to be posted until at least the next day when they can be approved.” Kent rattled off the rules he had been told again and again, but he was already going to instagram. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>He’d gotten a notification that Mashkov followed him the day after the engagement party, and he begrudgingly followed him back, glad now that he did because he was able to berate the Russian in direct messages. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <b>
    <em>What the hell? Are you trying to </em>
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    <em>get my boys in trouble and kicked </em>
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    <em>off the team?????</em>
  </b>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>The reply came almost instantly. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <b>
    <em>Relax Parson, need to learn </em>
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    <em>how to have fun ))))))))</em>
  </b>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <b>
    <em>I’m blaming anything bad on you</em>
  </b>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <b>
    <em>As long as you come </em>
  </b>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <b>
    <em>Fine.</em>
  </b>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <b>
    <em>))))))</em>
  </b>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Kent remembered having to ask about the parenthesis when he first joined juniors. It was a very common text from the Russian players, and he never wanted to be left behind, especially in texting where he usually had so much control. He hadn’t felt out of control like that in a long time, and he was wondering whether this party was going to put him back there. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>They all chatted and finished their coffee, and as Kent looked at his phone, he had five new notifications of Alexei liking his most recent instagram posts. He was up to something, Kent just wasn’t sure what that was yet. </span>
</p>
<p><br/>
<br/>
</p>
<p>
  <span>________________________________</span>
</p>
<p><br/>
<br/>
<br/>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Over the next week and a half before the party, Kent had learned three things:</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>One; the Aces didn’t get out of their houses nearly enough if they were this excited about a party. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Two; Mashkov was actually quite funny. That is, if Tater’s replies to his instagram stories and comments on his posts were an indicator of anything. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Three; he was actually very excited for this weekend. Kent would deny it if anyone asked, but as the friday night before the party on Saturday approached, he found himself taking a hot bath, mud mask, hair mask, bath bomb, and all. If he was turning up, he was turning up looking as good as humanly possible. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>The team had agreed to get tickets seated together in business class for the five hour flight into New York the next morning, deciding that there weren’t enough of them going to even consider a charter flight. Most of the team was off holidaying, or decided to stay home with their families. Kent was torn between feeling bad that they missed out, and wishing that he had a reason to stay home. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Kit was taken care of by the kids that lived a few floors down from Kent’s apartment in his building. The four siblings were always happy to help out and spend time with her, and it felt better to support them and their mother who always seemed stressed out than to get a professional sitter. He was only going to be gone one night anyway, and Kit always seemed happy when he got home. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“You’re looking well exfoliated.” Swoops grinned at him as they all met up by their gate bright and early on Saturday morning, bumping his shoulder into Kent’s. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Shut up, I haven’t been out in ages and I felt like treating myself.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Jeff raised one eyebrow but said nothing, and Kent felt stupid for ever having told his best friend about what happened at the engagement party. He didn’t, really, but he wasn’t a fan of being chirped when he still didn’t know how he felt about it all. He tugged on the strings of the black Lady Gaga hoodie that he wore on flights, not really excited to wear his plane clothes to a party. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Maybe being admired is nice. You wouldn’t know, you’re always crusty.” He laughed as he was rewarded with an offended gasp, and turned to catch up with the rest of the guys before they boarded the plane. A lot of the really young guys were staying back to prepare for training camp, although some of them were sneaking out for a weekend of fun, so that mostly left the few guys around Kent’s age, some of them younger and some older, but everyone roughly in their twenties and early thirties. There was Gutter, Shifty, Ropes, and Drawbridge, as well as Swoops and Scraps. He supposed seven wasn’t a bad number of players to control, even though one of those was him. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>He was excited not to have to worry too much about the older judgemental guys like Carly. Even though he wasn’t planning on outing himself to the team anytime soon, they always got a bit stiff whenever Kent put on Gaga or anyone of the sort in the locker room, even though all of the other guys got a kick out of it too. They were also the only ones to say shit about Jack and Eric, and even though he told himself that deep down they would be okay with him being gay too because they knew him better, he was less and less sure. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Either way -- as he put on headphones, under eye masks, and a general face mask and relaxed back into his seat on the plane -- he decided he was going to let himself have fun tonight. He deserved it. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>He must’ve fallen asleep, because the next thing he knew he was being jostled awake by Swoops. He took off his headphones and raised his mask, looking around and trying to get his bearings. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“We’re not quite landed yet, but the captain said we’re about to make our descent. I know how you get with these sorts of things so I wanted you to have time to wake up fully before you have to move anywhere.” Kent laughed and nodded, saying thanks and pulling out his phone which was linked to the plane’s wifi and quickly checking his messages, sending one to Alexei before he even really thought about it. </span>
</p>
<p><br/>
<br/>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    <em>we’re probably landing soon, </em>
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    <em>did u need help setting up? </em>
  </b>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>The message came back faster than he expected. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <b>
    <em>no no all good! )) </em>
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    <em>thank you kent parson! </em>
  </b>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <b>
    <em>ok cool! we might head </em>
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    <em>out to brunch in a bit if u</em>
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    <em>want to join i’ll send the place</em>
  </b>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <b>
    <em>would be great!! thank you!! </em>
  </b>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Jeff looked over his shoulder and Kent didn’t have to look at him to know he was rolling his eyes. “This is a bad idea Parse.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I don’t know what you’re talking about. Brunch once we land?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  
</p>
<p>
  <span>Brunch was lovely, the party was only a short drive from JFK so they decided to meet up at a brunch spot in Queens that Scraps recommended. They met him there, and a few other guys that had shown up early to spend time with Alexei before the party. Two of them were Ransom and Holster, as they introduced themselves to the rest of the group but Kent managed to remember that they had previously mentioned their names were Justin and Adam, which he silently patted himself on the back for. He was also officially introduced to ‘Poots’, and ‘Snowy’ who he had met as Falconers but never really got a chance to socialise with before. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>The food was great after a long plane ride, though Kent didn’t really pay much attention to it, too busy laughing and listening to all of the stories being passed around the table. Jack’s name came up once or twice, but he really didn’t mind. If anything, he enjoyed just being able to talk about Jack like he was someone they were all friends with at some point. He liked the idea of being friends with these people. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>They finished eating quickly, the hockey players eating efficiently as most people would expect, Kent stealing bites from Scraps’ plate, Scraps stealing from Swoops, and Alexei stealing from Kent with a cheeky smile. He didn’t miss the look that Ransom and Holster gave each other at that, but luckily they were quickly distracted stealing from one another. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>The bill came and Kent rushed to pay it with a hefty tip, having to push Mashkov out of the way in order to do so. “I invited you and you’re throwing a party, Mashkov. Let me do this.” </span>
</p>
<p><br/>
<br/>
<br/>
</p>
<p>
  <span>________________________________</span>
</p>
<p><br/>
<br/>
<br/>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The party was being held at a rented house near where they had brunch in Queens, nothing too big or fancy that they would have to sell an organ to fix if anyone damaged anything, but big enough for forty to fifty hockey players to yell and not disturb the neighbours… too much. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Scraps, Swoops, and Kent went for a walk around the neighbourhood after brunch to kill time, and one of the recent trades joined them. His name was Oliver Gutsch but naturally, as hockey nicknames go, everyone called him Gutter. He was pretty small to hockey standards, not as small as Kent, but he held his own well and shocked the entire hockey world the first time he hit the ice. He checked like a champion, and skated faster than anyone Kent had seen in his time in the NHL. He’d never really talked to the kid much before, but as they walked into a small bookstore, he found himself drawn to his charm and kindness. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>They didn’t walk around too long, deciding to head to the hotel rooms they’d booked ahead of time. Even when they weren’t on the road, most of them chose to share their rooms. Loneliness is a funny thing when you’re out of home. Kent was with Swoops as always, unlocking the door to their room with the two doubles they’d requested once they had organised keys and payments at the front desk.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“This place is pretty nice.” He dumped his small overnight bag on the bed closer to the window and went to check his reflection in the mirror. Kent no longer tried to correct his cowlick, and instead made sure his dark circles weren’t too noticeable. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“It’s somewhere to sleep that I won’t have to worry about disinfecting myself.” Jeff laughed, following Kent’s lead in dropping his bag, but pulling out his phone to text someone instead. Kent slipped off his shoes and pulled the button up shirt out of his bag to hang up, then set up the hotel iron that he’d requested before padding across to his own bed. He pulled out his phone and checked Twitter first, then Instagram. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>He swiped through his notifications of story mentions, most being fans or news outlets, sending the fire react to a few photos of fans in his jersey and sharing one to his own story before he saw the one that Mashkov had tagged him in. It was a picture from brunch, his eyes closed and his nose scrunched as he held up a fry. Swoops, Poots, and Gutter were also in it, either laughing or rolling their eyes, and it made something seize up in Kent’s chest. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <b>
    <em>i don’t even remember you taking </em>
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    <em>that video!! creep haha</em>
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    <em>it’s good video. aces pr would </em>
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    <em>disagree with u P</em>
  </b>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>He went on twitter and searched for the video only to find it had already been uploaded by a fan, so he saved it without the instagram watermark. He looked over to Swoops and smiled seeing him trying to take a selfie for snapchat. There was something about feeling settled that he was starting to get used to. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>He reached to the side table of his bed and pulled out the remote, flicking it to some channel that was running </span>
  <em>
    <span>FRIENDS</span>
  </em>
  <span> reruns and let himself watch it and relax into the ridiculous number of hotel pillows as he scrolled through his twitter feed. He showed things to Swoops occasionally and got memes shown to him in return. A few hours passed easily and he was starting to feel restless, so he propped himself up on his elbows, begrudgingly turning away from the young Matthew Perry on the screen to look at his best friend. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Hey is there a liquor store nearby? I was thinking we could get some beers because the party is still a few hours off and I’m bored. We can invite the other guys to our room for drinks beforehand, maybe? Remind everyone of the rules and listen to music then maybe head over together?” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Yeah of course. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Remind everyone of the rules</span>
  </em>
  <span> that’ll be a whole lot of fun captain.” Jeff laughed and fell back to lay on the bed, typing on his phone. “That’s not a bad idea though, I’ll just google where the nearest place is and then we can go.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Kent slipped on his shoes and they found that the nearest liquor store was just a five minute walk so he sent out a text to see which of the guys wanted to come to their hotel room before heading out. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>He got in the elevator with Swoops and leaned against the side wall, pulling out his phone to message Mashkov and check the replies from the guys. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <b>
    <em>getting some alcohol for predrinks, </em>
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    <em>u need any drinks or snacks for 2nite? </em>
  </b>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Gutter, Scraps, and and Ropes are coming to our room, the other two are apparently already out at a bar somewhere with some chicks? I don’t know what rookies get up to.” He laughed and rolled his eyes as the elevator doors opened to the lobby and he pulled on his trademark snapback.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Honestly I’ll be shocked if they even make it to the party, but we’re not their parents or their billets so who cares.” Swoops swayed his steps so he could bump his shoulder against Kent’s. “Loosen up old man.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“You’re right, you’re right. I just need to get some beers in my system and everything will be fine.” They walked down the street and stopped before they got to the liquor store to buy some snacks, before continuing to get a case of beers. He was hoping that they wouldn’t drink them </span>
  <em>
    <span>all</span>
  </em>
  <span> between the five of them, but knew that whatever they didn’t drink they’d be able to just take to the party afterwards. He checked his phone just before they got to the register to see that Alexei had replied. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <b>
    <em>u are good guest kent parson,</em>
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    <em>but i am good host. just bring u )))</em>
  </b>
</p>
<p><br/>
<br/>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He liked the message and grabbed one of the fancier bottles of wine he could find, just to spite him. Swoops let him pay, but insisted that he carry the beer back to the hotel. Kent made a joke about wanting to show off his weight training and they laughed as they stepped into the lobby and went straight to the elevator. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Kent set up a small speaker as soon as they shut the door, grabbing a beer and pressing shuffle on his party playlist, grinning as </span>
  <em>
    <span>Gimme More</span>
  </em>
  <span> began to play. He banged on the wall of the room beside them, knowing that Scraps was staying there. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>He was the one who had opted for a single room, with seven people splitting the numbers unevenly. He seemed happy about it though, as one of the few people on the team who lived with roommates it was a relief to have some space to himself. Kent sent a text to the other two and began to pass out beers as the door opened, Swoops already on his first. He handed the bottle opener to Kent as he pretended he wasn’t subtly dancing to the song.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ropes and Gutter joined them shortly after, getting beers and enjoying the music alongside Kent, even joining his awful singing when Paramore came on. They demolished the snacks and had a few beers each, laughing at each other’s impressions of other members of the team and inevitably trading embarrassing stories about their time as junior hockey players. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“What was it like to play alongside Zimmermann?” Ropes asked after Kent finished telling a story about how he’d snuck out at one of their training camps to get alcohol and got caught by one of their handlers at the time, but had managed to play it off as having lost a necklace he owned at the time. He’d laughed telling it, talking about the two of them looking through the dirt for half an hour before he’d managed to slip it off subtly and pitch it a few feet away then ‘miraculously’ find it again. He wasn’t laughing now, though. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Swoops looked at him carefully, the only one in the room with the entire story even though Scraps had some insight from that night they’d visited the Haus. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“It was good. Really good. It’s rare to find someone who you click with like that on the ice, but it’s almost magical when it does happen.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Is he always as stoic as he seems in the media? I mean, he has to have some kind of emotion right?” Gutter had a glisten in his eye that Kent didn’t want to think about too long. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“No, he loosens up a lot once you get to know him. But I don’t really know him anymore. Maybe he’ll be there tonight and you’ll be able to see for yourself!” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh I hope he’s there, I want to beat his ass in pong.” Scraps finished the beer in his hand and laughed. “I heard someone from his college team is a boss at it though, I wonder if anyone can beat him.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Kent was grateful for the change of pace, even though he knew it was intentional. “I played his old teammate. Though, <em>she</em> was actually the team manager. And I don’t know if anyone can beat her.” He laughed at Scraps’ blush, and bumped his knee against Jeff’s, not even needing to look at him to know what he was thinking. </span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Chapter Four</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>They didn’t stay in the hotel room for long after that, Kent had ironed his shirt and gotten changed just before the other boys arrived for drinks, the light blue fabric contrasting with his tight black jeans that Swoops rolled his eyes at but couldn’t deny that his ass looked good in them. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>They opted to get an Uber XL to the party, bringing the alcohol with them as they poured out of the car. Kent gave the guy a hefty tip purely for the awful rendition of </span>
  <em>
    <span>Party in the USA</span>
  </em>
  <span> that they all gave. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The house looked quiet from the outside, but it was definitely alive. The lights in the windows were glowing and there were shadows moving around in front of them though there wasn’t the usual pulsing of music that’d easily wake an entire neighbourhood. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>They were fashionably late, naturally, not wanting to get there as the party started but not wanting to miss any of the fun. Kent led the guys in through the front door, grinning as a few people turned to look at them. He greeted a few familiar players as he walked in, his stomach knotting for a second when he saw Jack and Eric talking to a few of the Falcs. He thought they were out of town this weekend, but apparently not. The party was big enough that they could avoid each other at least, he thought. Poots came up and directed him to the garage where he could put down the beers and apparently find Tater, which he assumed was Mashkov’s hockey nickname. There was something about the way he said it that Kent chose to ignore, but he went in that direction anyway. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He knocked on the door and heard a grunt of “It’s open,” before he opened the door to the spacious garage. He didn’t want to say that it looked like the one in </span>
  <em>
    <span>Scream</span>
  </em>
  <span>, but it totally did. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hey, Mashkov. I was told there was a beer fridge in here?” The taller hockey player was crouched down over a spare fridge, standing up with two bottles in hand and a surprised look on his face. His outfit was pretty simple, black jeans with a white button up that had been rolled up to his elbows and was unbuttoned just enough to show the white undershirt beneath it. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Parson! I said not to bring anything!” He chastised, and Kent almost felt bad for a second before rolling his eyes to play it off. </span>
  <span><br/>
<br/>
</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We were having beers before we came here, and didn’t want them to go to waste. It’s not some big gift or anything.” He walked over to where the other man was and put some into the fridge, letting some of the others sit on the floor so that they weren’t taking up unnecessary space. He took one of the bottles out of Alexei’s hand and put the bottle of wine in its place. “This is a gift though.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>There was an unreadable expression on Mashkov’s face as he turned the bottle in his hand and looked at the label. “Very fancy Kent Parson, what did I do to earn such a lovely gift?” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“It’s nothing, just uh, thanks for being there at the engagement party. It was kind of weird for me and you made the night bearable.” He popped the top off his bottle with the back of his shoe and smiled, patting the man’s strong chest before turning and going back to the party with a little pep to his walk. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He was past denying that he was attracted to Alexei, and while he wasn’t sure where the Falconer stood on his own sexuality or relationships but he knew that it definitely wasn’t one sided. It just wasn’t up to him to make the first move. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He slipped easily into a conversation Swoops was having with Ransom and Holster, leaning over the back of his friend’s shoulder and taking a sip from his beer as they talked about math or something. Honestly, he wasn’t sure he was ever going to understand, but he nodded along, happy to let the words wash over him. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He heard a familiar voice over his shoulder and turned around with a smile. “Hey! Nurse, right?” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Kent Parson, we’ve met enough times that you can stop pretending not to know my name. It’s not as cute as you think it is.” He shook his head, but Kent could tell from the slight heat to his cheeks that, yes, it was as cute as he thought it was. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You got me there. Where’s that redhead you always hang around with?” He tried to look over the crowded room, only seeing burly redheads, not the one with the big ears and cropped short hair. </span>
  <span></span><br/>
<br/>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh he chose not to come tonight. It’s… complicated.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Complicated how?” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He sat back against a small table that had been set up to hold drinks as the other man launched into a story about how they had been fighting over something or other, happy to just listen. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“And then he said something about me being privileged? Can you believe that? Like, I know that money hasn’t been an issue for me in the way it has for him, but it’s not like that doesn’t have its own issues still. Straight guys are just so exhausting. He decided not to come to the party like I was supposed to back out, like it was my fault that he couldn’t get over our differences enough to be in the same room as me.” He sighed and rubbed a hand over his face. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Okay Derek, I’m going to say something and it might not be helpful, because obviously you’re completely right about all of this and he sounds like a dick.” He kept talking over Nurse’s clear objection to him saying that about Dex, “but have you ever considered that Will might be gay? Or at least, realising that he’s not as straight as he once thought?” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Nursey looked down at his beer and considered it for a second before bringing it to his lips and swallowing. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’m not saying that he is for sure, and I don’t want to out him because I barely know the kid, but. From what I’ve seen, he’s grown a lot over the years and I just think it could be a possibility. I’m not saying he’s right in what he’s done, just that— y’know, we’ve all done dumb stuff in that situation.” He stopped for a second, the colour draining from his face as he realised what he’d just said. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You could be right. Why can’t it just be easy though? I just want to find a nice guy who knows what he wants.” Nurse didn’t really seem to notice what Kent had said, so he tried to pretend he’d never said anything. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Where’s the fun in that?” He saw the door open and his heart stopped for half a second. “Don’t look now, but heads up that he just arrived. And he’s making his way over here.” He gave him a pat on the shoulder and had a long sip of his beer, noticing that it was almost finished before he weaved his way through the party. He saw Scraps talking to Poots and stopped for a second to wait for their conversation to finish before leaning in. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hey I’m getting another drink, do you guys need anything?” Poots shook his head and held up his nearly full cup, though Scraps turned his shoulders from where he was heading to the garage so he was facing the opposite direction. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“They’re making cocktails in the kitchen, I’d recommend ditching the beer.” Kent nodded with a grin and bumped him with his shoulder. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Thanks for looking out.” He headed in that direction as the other two kept talking, seeing Dex lead Nursey out of the house toward the backyard. He wanted to follow because of his nosy nature, but knew that was a bad idea. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>When he finally got to the kitchen after being pulled into several conversations, he realised that Scraps wasn’t entirely telling the truth. Tater was making cocktails. He’d stripped out of the dress shirt he was wearing earlier, now only in a tight white v neck t shirt as he shook the steel container that looked tiny in his hands. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>There were a few girlfriends and guests sitting at the kitchen bar just watching him adoringly, which got a laugh from Kent as he slipped into one of the empty seats and pulled out his phone to take a video. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Oi! No photos Kent Parson!” Tater yelled, though there was no malice behind it, his eyes crinkling at the corners as he poured a bright pink liquid into three martini glasses. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You took one this morning. We’re even.” He stuck his tongue out cheekily and put his phone away. “I didn’t know you were a bartender.” The women left with the drinks and returned to their respective partners who were all standing in a group together. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I learned to impress girls.” He held a finger up to his own lips with a smile. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Is it working?” He gestured to the empty seats beside him.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You’re here.” Alexei rinsed out the metal shaker and started to load it up with shots of alcohol that Kent couldn’t quite keep up with, before filling it with ice. He winked and started to shake it for a little while, moving his hips to the music as he did so before pouring out a blue drink and handing the cup to Kent. “What do you think?” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Kent took a sip and tried to hide his smile as he frowned in thought. “Notes of blueberry, vodka, a hint of something I can’t quite put my finger on…” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Alexei laughed louder than Kent had really heard before, a free unrestrained noise as he bumped his shoulder with a light fist. “Don’t be pretentious! What do you think?” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“It’s good.” He took another drink from the glass. “It’s really good. What is this?” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Falconer’s special.” Kent rolled his eyes and gasped when Alexei stole the drink from his hand to have a sip. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Make your own, since you won’t tell me how!” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“But yours is better.” He grinned. “Oh! I think it is time for beer pong!” He handed the drink back and moved swiftly through the crowd, picking up a fold away table like it was nothing and setting it up on the back porch as Lardo and Gutter got cups to set up. This was something Kent had to see. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Naturally she took him down in record time, leaving Oliver to admit defeat and bow down to her, Shitty taking a photo for their wall of fame. More and more people decided to play, and when Bitty stepped up for flip cup, Kent decided to slip away and explore the now mostly empty backyard. He pulled out his phone and sent a text reply to one of the girls who ran The Aces PR. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>
    <em>please let me know if anything goes </em>
  </b>
</p><p>
  <b>
    <em>wrong tonight. need to be ahead of any</em>
  </b>
</p><p>
  <b>
    <em>news cycle.</em>
  </b>
</p><p>
  <b>
    <em>of course. who do u think i am?</em>
  </b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>
    <em>nothing bad so far just gutter </em>
  </b>
</p><p>
  <b>
    <em>losing pretty hard at pong :P</em>
  </b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I see you’re still coming out to hide at parties.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The voice made him jump and he clutched his hand over his now rapidly beating heart. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Jesus Christ, Zimms, warn a guy.” He laughed gently. “Just needed to get a bit of quiet, you know what it’s like.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yeah, I do. Mind if I sit?” He was already sitting anyway, but Kent moved slightly to give him room. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Make yourself comfortable.” Kent finished the beer that he’d been handed between rounds of beer pong, still not quite drunk because he’d been pacing himself but knowing he’d have to be a little further than two drinks in if he was having any kind of conversation with Jack. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“When you said you were bringing a plus one I never expected it to be Jeff.” Jack broke the silence after a while, just sitting and kicking his toes into the dirt. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Kent frowned for a second before realising that Jack was talking about their engagement party. He was supposed to still be dating Swoops as far as they were concerned. “Yeah, well what can I say? We’re happy. I would’ve told you but…” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I know. What was that you were saying about coming down to the Haus? Bits never told me about that.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Oh, uh… I thought he would’ve. I came to your college at the end of one of those keggers the last time we were in town on a roadie. I was hoping to catch you there but I guess you were also in the middle of the season. Oversight on my part.” He sighed and spun the cold can around in the palms of his hands. “I just wanted to say good luck. With everything. And that I’m sorry.” Jack opened his mouth to say something in response, but Kent wanted to make sure that Jack heard everything for once. “When we were back in juniors, I treated you like shit. That wasn’t fair. I really didn’t mean to hurt you and I know that’s not an excuse, but I guess I was just hoping that we could move forward is all. You don’t have to forgive me or anything, but I just wanted you to know that.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Thanks. And you know that wasn’t all your fault, right?” Kent’s stomach fell through his knees. He wasn’t going to let this affect him like it would’ve years ago. He breathed in deeply, focusing on the feeling of aluminum on his fingertips and the night air filling his lungs as he let it ground him. “I used to think it was. I thought you were the one who took everything from me. Hell, sometimes I even thought you did it on purpose. That's not true. We were kids, Kenny. I treated you like shit, too. I should've said something sooner but I guess I'm still just accepting that I did some awful things too. I never knew how to talk to you about it. We never really knew how to talk to each other about anything other than hockey. I only really realised how bitter I was when I met Eric.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Kent had never noticed that warmth in Jack’s eyes before, and while it made his chest ache, he knew what it meant. “I get it, don’t even worry about it Zimms, we’re old now, you’re engaged and happy and a big part of the reason I went down to talk to you in the first place was to say thank you for everything you’ve done for us. For queer hockey players everywhere. For me.... and Jeff, and the countless others. I wish I could be that brave.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You can be, if you want.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Kent let out a shallow laugh despite himself. “Yeah okay, sure. Thanks.” He ran a hand through his hair, almost forgetting that he’d opted not to wear his snapback to this party. “You’d better get back to your fiancé.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Right. I think he’s brought pies at Tater’s request.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I cannot wait for pie. No matter how weird it is to think of you with a fiancé.” He turned to walk back through the gate and bumped his shoulder against Jack’s arm gently. “And I’m always a phone call away if you ever need to talk about anything, Zimms. Trust me, I know what it’s all like.” He dropped the empty can in the small recycling bin as he walked back into the party and slipped into a conversation beside Jeff, resting his head on his shoulder and being silently thankful that he didn’t even react. </span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>sorry for the slow update on this one! i realised that i didn't like the pacing of the story and had to do an overhaul of the next few chapters but i'm much happier with it now. next chapter is a doozy though</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Chapter Five</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Okay so it turns out that I have lost all notions of time passing because I could've SWORN it was only a few days since I last updated this! Nevertheless here we are, things are starting to kick up a little? Maybe? </p><p>Content warning for this chapter - mentions of drug addiction and abuse.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Most of the party passed without incident, though there was a moment where he went to get some more beer and bumped into Nursey and Dex coming back to the party, looking suitably disheveled but glowing. He smiled at them, not wanting to say anything to pop the bubble that they were probably floating around in. He carried an armful of beers back to the main room with him, handing them to the others as he joined a conversation that Ropes was having with one of the Bruins and a few other players from teams around the area. They were talking about stats, maybe? He couldn’t focus. Someone said there was pizza in the kitchen so that’s where he headed next, realising he hadn’t eaten for most of the night. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He sat on the counter and demolished a few slices of pepperoni with his beer, enjoying the peace. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Kent Parson!” A few of the younger guys from the Pens? Maybe? Stumbled into the kitchen laughing amongst themselves. “You want some?” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Kent turned to look at him and his heart started beating faster, his ears ringing slightly. He saw the small bag of white powder held between his fingers and he wasn’t sure what to say. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hey you guys better get that shit out of here! Go on, get out!” Jack’s friend with the moustache from Samwell came into the kitchen, clearly looking for pizza and seeing what was going on. He chased them out of the house, not at all afraid of three hockey players twice his height and Kent was relieved but he knew he had to get out of there. He pushed his way out of the kitchen while everyone was distracted and made a beeline for the bathroom so he could splash his face. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He felt like a movie character, his hair and face dripping as he gripped the edges of the sink so hard that his knuckles turned white. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Deep breaths, Kent.</span>
  </em>
  <span> A voice that sounded suspiciously like his therapist and sponsor mixed together reminded him as he slowly let go of the ceramic and slumped down onto the floor. The ringing in his ears subsided and he was finally able to breathe, pushing thoughts of everyone’s reactions back out to the other side of the door and checking himself in the mirror as he washed his hands. He couldn’t stay in the bathroom but he wasn’t ready to face everyone just yet. Garage it was. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Luckily the hallway that led to the bathroom was in the same wing of the house as the garage, so he kept his head down and didn’t really see anyone as he made his way into the large empty room, sitting on an old beer cooler. He fumbled his phone out, checking to make sure that no one had posted anything about what had just happened, and coming up with nothing except fans sharing the video from brunch. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Okay, not a PR problem. Not that it’d ever really be a shock to anyone if it were. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He put on a Taylor Swift mix and sat with his thoughts for a little while, grabbing a soda from the fridge and sitting back down where he was as he saw the door creak open slowly to reveal Tater. He didn’t say anything, just nodded in his direction. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You okay?” He stepped into the room and shut the door behind him, shutting out the noise of the party that had continued around them. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yeah, fine. Like I said last time, not exactly my crowd.” He tried to play it off with a laugh that just came out as hollow. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Tater crossed the room and pulled up a crate to sit across from Kent, their knees knocking together gently as he focused his energy on wiping off the condensation from the outside of the soda can. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“They are not my crowd either. They are gone, I promise.” Kent didn’t look up, knowing that tears were forming at the base of his eyes and threatening to fall. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I just froze. I don’t know what’s wrong with me.” His voice came out smaller than he meant them to, getting stuck in his throat. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Is not your fault.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You don’t get it.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Kent Parson.” There was something in Alexei’s voice that made him look up into the stern expression that was held tightly on his face. “You know what happened to Jack. Do you blame him for what happened?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Kent knew what he was asking. “No.” He answered honestly. “He was a kid and he was scared.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Then why do you blame yourself?” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He had no answer for that, just fiddling with the tab on the soda can. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You’re a good man, Kent Parson.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You’re delusional.” He looked up and smiled, bumping his knee against Alexei’s. “Thank you.” His phone buzzed in his pocket and he pulled it out, seeing the notification that he had a few missed texts from Swoops. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>
    <em>Where are you? Are you okay? </em>
  </b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>
    <em>Here if you need anything kp &lt;3</em>
  </b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>
    <em>Mashkov said he was looking for </em>
  </b>
</p><p>
  <b>
    <em>you and he hasn’t returned so i’m</em>
  </b>
</p><p>
  <b>
    <em>hoping the two of you are in a closet</em>
  </b>
</p><p>
  <b>
    <em>somewhere making out or i’ll be very</em>
  </b>
</p><p>
  <b>
    <em>disappointed. </em>
  </b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>
    <em>JK x </em>
  </b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>
    <em>hey sorry i’m ok. found tater and we</em>
  </b>
</p><p>
  <b>
    <em>are NOT making out. he definitely</em>
  </b>
</p><p>
  <b>
    <em>pities me now though so score</em>
  </b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>
    <em>in the garage if you want to come check</em>
  </b>
</p><p>
  <b>
    <em>but i am doing ok promise x</em>
  </b>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>
  <span>“Your boyfriend?” Tater had a smile tugging at his lips but seemed to be genuinely asking at the same time. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Swoops.” He said as an answer. “So no, but if Jack asks, maybe.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Maybe?” Tater’s head tilted slightly to one side, and Kent had to work hard to not liken him to a puppy. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I didn’t have the heart to tell him that he was just pretending to be my boyfriend at the engagement party. It’s uh…” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Complicated.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yeah.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Kent didn’t know how much he knew, but since Jack came out their old photos and rumours picked back up with a vengeance. He never said anything but it didn’t take a genius to put two and two together. They settled into silence for a few seconds, neither of them knowing what to say. But there was a knock at the door and both of their heads whipped up to see Swoops opening the door slowly. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Saved you guys some pie.” Tater was at the door almost impossibly quickly with a grin. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Blueberry!” He went to grab the plate and Swoops pulled the plates out of his grip. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Uh uh, you need to pay the toll first.” The frown that pinched Alexei’s features was almost comical, so Kent got up to show him how Jeff always did things, planting a kiss on Swoops’ cheek. Alexei quickly followed but Swoops cheekily passed the two plates to Kent before shutting the door again with a wink. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“He’s a dick. Here.” He passed the plate to Tater, turning to face him as he was leaning in to kiss his cheek. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>His heart stuttered as their lips brushed against one another. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Mashkov stuttered out something in Russian that Kent knew meant </span>
  <em>
    <span>shit</span>
  </em>
  <span>, or </span>
  <em>
    <span>fuck</span>
  </em>
  <span>, or something similar. He stepped back and his entire face was bright red, but Kent knew that his wasn’t much different. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I am so sorry. It was an accident. I just meant to kiss cheek. Parson. I am sorry.” He was babbling as Kent slowly turned to put the pie down on the crate where he was sitting, before turning back to him. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hey, calm down. It’s okay. I’m sorry too, it was a mistake. It’s fine.” Kent handed him one of the plates and they both ate in silence. “This is so much better than the pies on the black market.” Kent laughed and polished his piece off quickly, trying to chase away the feeling of Alexei’s lips on his. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Black market? You are weird Kent Parson.” His low chuckle brought Kent’s attention to the taller man, and the blueberry smudged under his bottom lip. It was all so cliche. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hey, you have… Uh…” He pointed to his own lip. </span>
  <span></span>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh! Thank you.” He ran his tongue over the spot and managed to miss it completely so Kent reached up to slide his thumb through the blue filling, and deciding to be bold, slipped his thumb into his own mouth to clear it off. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Alexei’s eyes darkened at that and Kent knew he had the upper hand again, smiling sweetly and taking his plate. “We’d better get back to the party, wouldn’t want to be a bad host.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He made it to the door before he felt a hand on his wrist pull him back. He turned around to ask what was up but the question died on his tongue as Alexei’s hands came up to cup his face. The steps out of the garage allowed them to stand at eye level, and his eyes fluttered shut as their lips came together. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He was glad that the plates were paper as he dropped them without a single thought, his hands coming up to rest on Alexei’s shoulders. His knees almost gave out as he was kissed, and kissed back. The hands on his face dropped to his hips, and in response he ran his tongue across the other man’s lower lip, grinning as he tasted blueberry lingering there. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I understand that drink you made me now.” He pulled back to murmur against his lips, before leaning in for another gentle kiss. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hm?” Alexei’s thumbs rubbed circles into his waist as he tilted his head in confusion yet again. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Blueberries.” He said as if that explained everything, flicking his tongue gently against his bottom lip, smiling as the hands on his waist tightened ever so slightly. “I make great pancakes.” He kissed him again and stepped back, turning to the door and running a hand through his hair as he walked back into the party. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Shut up. We’ll talk later.” He took Swoops’ drink and murmured as he walked past, winking at him with a grin he couldn’t quite get rid of. He stopped past the kitchen to see if there was any food left, grabbing himself a cold slice of pizza and making a vodka lime soda for himself. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hey. You okay?” He heard the kitchen door open and turned to see Shitty leaning against one of the cabinets, his arms crossed over his chest. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yeah I’m fine. Thank you for stepping in earlier, I know most of you guys don’t like me but that was really cool of you.” He took a bite of pizza and leaned against the bench behind him, realising that he wasn’t good at being sincere. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“No problem man, that stuff is never chill around here. We get stoned occasionally, but it’s different you know?” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yeah. I know.” He blew out a laugh. “I don’t know if you’ve told anyone really but could you try and keep it between us? I don’t really care what they say about me but you know… Jack.” He trailed off and shrugged. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yeah, of course. Safe with me.” He mimed a cross over his heart and moved to pour himself a drink that was definitely close to what he’d heard called ‘tub juice’ at one of those keggers. “And when it comes to us not liking you, that’s not the case. You were kids. You did some fucked up things from what I can gather, but I think you know that.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yeah, but Bitty--” He wasn’t sure why he was trying to argue. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Bitty is different, he’s just protective. Jack was pretty busted up when he got to Samwell, and he’s better now, but that doesn’t change the fact that we all saw how it affected him, and you were…” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Las Vegas party boy. Untouchable. I know.” He nodded, staring into his drink as if it’d tell him the right thing to say. “I’m not excusing my actions, and I don’t expect any of you to forgive me, I just wanted to say thank you for looking out for me tonight. And for looking out for Jack when I didn’t.” He rubbed his right eye with the heel of his hand. “He’s lucky to have friends like you.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Oh. I, uh. Thanks, Parson.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Don’t mention it.” He finished his pizza and smiled, heading for the door as he saw Lardo enter. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Sorry I didn’t get to rematch you tonight, Parson. I mean, sorry I didn’t get to kick your ass again.” She smiled at him, and he rolled his eyes even though he couldn’t stop the grin pulling at his face. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I can’t face that embarrassment just yet, but I’m practicing daily. It was good to see you take down Oliver, thank you for that.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“It was nice to see you talk to Nurse, I don’t know what you said but you’re softer than you look, KP.” She winked, throwing Kent off so much that he didn’t know what to say to that, so he just nodded his head and headed back out to the main area, pulling out his phone to see that it was just past midnight. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“God I’m getting old.” </span>
</p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. Chapter Six</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>They crashed back into the hotel at around two o’clock in the morning, laughing but mostly out of exhaustion. Ropes had disappeared halfway through the night, and Gutter had decided to stay a little longer after they decided to set up a fire pit in the backyard so it was just the three of them. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Scraps pressed the button for the elevator and they stumbled to it, trying to be as quiet as possible and probably failing. Kent leaned his head into Swoops’ chest once the doors closed, letting the older man run his fingers through his hair. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Aw, you two are just so cute. Couple of the year, I think?” Kent looked up at Scraps who was wearing a self-satisfied grin. They’d told him about the engagement party plan and naturally he got endless enjoyment from it. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Kent kicked a leg out in a weak attempt at a response, purposefully not colliding with him. “Shut up, you’re just jealous.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Of what? The </span>
  <em>
    <span>second</span>
  </em>
  <span> sweetest NHL relationship?” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Zimms has nothing on us.” He stood as the elevator door opened, suddenly excited to wash his face and get out of the jeans he’d been wearing all day. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“At least Zimmermann isn’t cheating on his beau.” Kent stopped and looked at him with a confused frown. “Don’t think I didn’t notice you disappear with Mashkov.” Scraps said with a grin and a wink. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I have no idea what you’re talking about.” Swoops pulled out the room key and Kent knew he wasn’t convincing either of them. “Okay maybe I do. Shut up.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He went straight to his bag to get changed, ignoring the fact that he could feel Jeff’s eyes on the back of his head. “Get ready for bed first, then deets.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’m coming over for deets!” Was yelled through the wall, and he honestly couldn’t be shocked.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Twenty minutes later they were all sitting on the bed as Kent told them everything that happened. Maybe not </span>
  <em>
    <span>everything </span>
  </em>
  <span>but enough. He felt the ghost of Alexei’s hands on his waist as he talked about it, and shrugged. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“And I left.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“That’s it? You just left?” Swoops started at him, stunned. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Well, obviously.” When the other two just continued to stare silently, he continued. “I’m not putting out before we’ve even had a real date, I’ve got some class.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Was he at least a good kisser?” Scraps grinned, clearly teasing him, but Kent felt himself flush anyway. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Get lost. He was… Yeah. He knows what he’s doing.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I don’t want to burst your bubble but… What now?” Swoops had been silent for a little while, approaching the question gently. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I… I don’t know. I guess it’s up to him, it’s hard you know? Because we’re always on the road, and so is he. But I can’t just leave my life on hold until I retire.” He rubbed his right eye slowly, thinking about it all. “The ball’s in his court. We can figure it out if he decides to do something with that.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Swoops ruffled the top of Kent’s hair. “I’m glad you’re thinking about this logically, we’ve got your back kid.” He returned to his bed and Scraps checked his phone before standing as well. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“He’s hot though, we wouldn’t blame you if you move to the Falcs to tap that on a regular basis.” He nodded solemnly and headed out of the room, stopping in the doorframe to blow a kiss to Kent who was giving him the finger. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He was glad he could finally settle into bed, pulling out his phone and laying back on the pillow that he’d already put his own protector on. If his gut swooped at the name that came up on his phone, no one needed to know. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>
    <em>pancakes? tomorrow morning? ))))))</em>
  </b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>
    <em>i offered didn’t i? i’ll be there</em>
  </b>
</p><p>
  <b>
    <em>at 10 with ingredients. :P</em>
  </b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Probably won’t be here by the time you wake up.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Understandable. Use protection.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You’re gross.” </span>
</p><p><br/>
<br/>
</p><p>
  <span>______________________________</span>
</p><p><br/>
<br/>
</p><p>
  <span>Kent woke to his alarm in the morning, an old song by The 1975 that he had set months ago. It wasn’t loud, but the response was pavlovian at this point. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He sat up, running a hand over his face. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Okay. Maybe a little more hungover than expected. </span>
  </em>
  <span>He slipped out of bed and quietly headed to the bathroom, filling a hotel glass with tap water and drinking it down as he waited for the shower to heat up. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>In the past few years, Kent had really started to love showers. They were perfunctory at best in locker rooms, but stepping under the hot spray really let the tension seep out of his shoulders. He ran through the events of the night before, lathering the hotel body wash over his hands and letting the water run down his neck. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>By the time the elevator reached the lobby he was starting to feel like himself again. The morning air dried his hair on the way to the grocery store, and he got two punnets of blueberries and the right ingredients to make pancakes, the fancy kind where he got flour and eggs and milk. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>It was hard calling the Uber with groceries in one hand and coffee cups in the other, but he managed it, and was there in no time. Kent knocked at the front door, and waited silently while he dramatically considered breaking in so that he could serve breakfast in bed before Alexei woke up. It wasn’t long before the door opened to reveal an extremely disheveled  looking hockey player wearing the same white t-shirt from the night before and grey sweats, whose eyes lit up when he finished yawning. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Kent Parson! Come in!” He stepped back from the door to make room for Kent and his coffee, closing the front door behind him. “Sorry, didn’t mean to sleep in.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You had a big night, you’re allowed to sleep. Sorry I woke you.” Kent laughed and followed through to the kitchen, placing down his bag and holding out a cup to Alexei as a silent peace offering. “I don’t know how you take it so I just got it black. I figured you could add anything you wanted.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I like it black. Thank you.” He took the lid off the cup and inhaled deeply, mirroring Kent as he took a mouthful of his own caramel latte. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>They sat and drank in silence, Kent leaning against the island and Alexei mirroring him leaning against the sink. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I got all of the ingredients to make pancakes, I wasn’t sure if you were actually serious about that, but now I’m kind of craving them. Is that weird?” He put down his coffee once it was finished and turned to grab the blueberries off the counter, rinsing them in the sink.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Not weird at all. I’m never turning down pancakes from a pretty boy.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“They’re no Eric Bittle pancakes, but…” Kent tried and failed to hide his grin, finding joy in the way that Alexei’s eyebrow quirked at him. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’m sure they will be great. And if not, I will eat them anyway.” He motioned to zip his lips and winked, helping Kent find the bowls and pans that he needed. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Do you mind if I go wash up? I am still gross from last night.” Kent nodded, pretending not to like the way that he smelled like the party still, a little like alcohol and smoke, but a little sweaty too. It was gross, but sue him he was a hockey player for a reason. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Go for it, I’ll get these ready while you do.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He’d made the pancakes that were staying warm in the oven, and was working on a quick blueberry coulis when Alexei returned. He heard the feet behind him and smiled, pouring the sauce into a small gravy boat he found and turning around to see the other man watching him. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Everything okay?” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yes. I brushed my teeth.” Alexei was smiling at him and Kent couldn’t quite figure out why. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You look like you showered too, why are you smiling like that?” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He barely got the question out before Alexei had crossed the kitchen, lifting Kent onto a clear space of the counter easily and kissing him deeply. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Oh.” He tangled his fingers in the still damp hair, and leaned down for another kiss, his knees spreading slightly to make room for the man standing between them. “Minty fresh.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hush.” He could tell Alexei was laughing slightly against his lips, but he felt his tongue run across his bottom lip and let him deepen the kiss, tilting his head for a better angle. He finally remembered the pancakes and pulled back, even though his brain was mostly mush at this point. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“The pancakes are done.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Mmmm…” Alexei kissed down his neck and he made no real move to stop him, still running his fingers through the dark hair that was getting a little shaggy. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Lex…” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Alexei stepped back, grinning at him. “Lex? Very cute.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Oh shut it.” He kissed him again gently before pushing past to take the pancakes out of the oven. “I got fresh orange juice too, but I didn’t know which glasses to use.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Alexei busied himself pouring out the juice into two cute tumblers with stars on them, as Kent plated up the pancakes with fresh berries and coulis drizzled over the top. The plates and glasses went to the small kitchen bar, as the whole house was still a bit of a mess from the party. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“The boys offered to clean but I said is fine, will get to it today.” Kent looked around at most of the glasses and few messy spots, noting that most of the cans had been tidied. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Looks like the calmest rager I’ve ever been to.” He laughed. “I’m happy to help if you want, gives me an excuse to spend more time here.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Who said you could spend more time?” It was hard to hear the chirp as Tater stuffed a chunk of pancake into his mouth, shutting his eyes and groaning softly. “This is very good.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Thank you.” He felt his cheeks heat and quickly changed the subject. “I can’t stay too long actually, I have a flight tonight and some kinda interview this afternoon with a magazine.” Kent took his own mouthful, swiping the next bite through the sauce on the plate. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Don’t tell Bitty, but maybe better than jam.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Okay, now you’re being ridiculous.” He reached his thumb out to wipe blueberry off Alexei’s face and tried hard not to think about the night before, instead thinking about how aggressively domestic this was. Or how he really didn’t mind. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Maybe. You should have seen your face though.” He laughed loudly, and they ate the rest of their breakfast like that, joking around and talking about their friends, finishing all of the pancakes and all of the orange juice. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Kent washed the dishes as Alexei collected all of the glasses around the house, and then they wiped down all of the surfaces and sweeped in tandem once Kent connected his phone to the speakers. He played his pop diva playlist and was silently satisfied that Alexei knew most of the songs. They stole kisses whenever their paths crossed, and only got seriously distracted once or twice. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>They ended up on the couch watching an early 2000’s Disney movie that Kent had picked out, trading kisses lazily as Kent sat leaning his back down Alexei’s side, his head against the other man’s shoulder and his arm around his waist. Kent’s phone buzzed with a soft alarm he’d set himself, and slowly extracted himself from Alexei’s hold. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hey, sorry to interrupt all of this, but I need to get to that interview.” He let himself be pulled into a kiss in response, easily climbing into Tater’s lap and deepening the kiss for a minute before sitting back. “I’m serious.” He laughed. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Okay okay, I’m miss you already.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Shut up.” Kent rolled his eyes and stood up, checking to make sure he had everything he needed. If he was being honest, he really didn’t want to leave, but being Kent Parson had its positives and negatives, and one of those negatives were the media responses of being team captain. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Have fun at the interview mister celebrity hockey player.” Alexei got up to lead him to the door, opening it and checking if there was anyone outside before moving to let Kent leave. “Text me.” </span>
</p><p><br/>
<span>“Will do. Thank you for this.” Kent smiled and hopped into another Uber, looking back at the man waving as they drove away. </span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0007"><h2>7. Chapter Seven</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Warnings for non-violent NHL-typical homophobia &lt;3</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>okay so it turns out i am hyperfixating on a new show and i : completely forgot that this was a thing i am so so very sorry </p><p>there are probably only a few chapters left though and they'll probably be finished very soon though!! thank you all for being wonderful and patient with me i love this story and i love these characters and i'm excited to give them the arc i always wanted :-)</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>The interview was definitely amongst Kent’s personal top ten favourite interviews he did while hungover. He had a lot of fun, and Jeff showed up at the end to join the fun and also so that they could get to the airport together. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He checked his messages a few times between that moment and when their plane took off, communicating with some of the other Aces who had stayed home, and those of them who were flying back later in the day. It was just him, Jeff, Scraps, and Gutter on the plane to no one’s real shock. They unashamedly bought two extra seats so that they had six seats together to talk and joke around without disturbing anyone for the five and a half hour flight, and Kent had a lot of fun. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Every time Kent looked at his phone though, there were no new messages from Alexei. He knew not to expect them, but he kept looking like some teenager. He took a selfie of the four of them one the plane, the other three not actually looking because they were busy fighting over some reality show. Kent hit post and put his phone back into his bag before turning to give them his thoughts. </span>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>
  <span>______________________________</span>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>
  <span>Alexei did text him though, later that night once Kent was in his pyjamas and washing his face. He turned so fast to his phone that he got toner in his eye. He forced himself to wait at least a few minutes before he replied, of course.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Over the next few weeks they texted and called, and even Skyped once or twice. It was nice, Kent realised that he really enjoyed Alexei’s company, and was enjoying getting to know him. He learned that Alexei had four siblings, and had been generously supplied with photos of them all. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He also learned that Alexei’s dad was a hockey star when he was young, much like Jack, but that it meant he was almost never home. Alexei said that it was like being raised by a single mother. Kent shared about his father leaving, and something hung heavy in the air that neither of them really wanted to touch. So he also learned about Alexei’s childhood, how he started playing hockey and how his mother was a figure skater. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Mostly though, they talked about television shows, and about Kit. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“She’s been really difficult today, I was trying to get work done but nope! She needed to sit on my laptop.” Kent laughed as his cat rubbed her face against the stubble that was growing on his chin. He was sitting on his bed in shorts and a loose button-up shirt, he’d gotten into comfortable clothes as soon as he got home from meetings and tried to get some emails sent out. But of course, Kit needed to be in the way so he just gave up and called Alexei on Skype.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“She is needing attention. Just like her dad.” Alexei teased with a certain glint in his eye. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Oh she always needs attention. Just like her dad.” Kent laughed, scratching her behind the ears. “Anyway, how was your day?” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“It was good! Zimmboni had us training again, but knee was hurting so I just sat on bench and got to eat pie.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’m so jealous that you get Bitty’s pie whenever you want.” Kent groaned. “Is your knee feeling okay?” Alexei had teased a while ago that Kent was just spying on the Falconers, but told him about the injury he’d received that had knocked him out of their playoff run the year beforehand. It was mostly fine now that everything had healed, but he was getting older and he had to watch it. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Is okay, trainers strapped it up and I have ice for later.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Okay, good.” Kent reached over to grab the bottle of water on his nightstand and looked at the screen to see both his exposed stomach and Alexei’s blushing cheeks. He sat back quickly, a little embarrassed. “Sorry about that.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“No need to apologise.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Oh. Okay.” They kept talking about their days, and if Kent reached over extra slowly to put down his bottle when it was empty, neither of them said anything. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Eventually they traded Snapchat too, Kent getting woken up in the morning with an extra sweaty post-workout selfie and retaliating later in the day with a sunny post-meeting selfie. </span>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>
  <span>______________________________</span>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>
  <span>Kent was just about to send a selfie of Kit sitting in his lap in his, admittedly tiny, pyjama shorts when he heard a loud knock at his door. She wasn’t too happy when he had to dislodge her to get up, but followed as he padded to the front door. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Swoops!” He had barely opened the door when the older man pushed into the apartment with bags of takeaway.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Big Brother time!”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yes! What did you bring me?” He got out plates from the kitchen, berating himself silently for losing track of the time when his best friend was supposed to show up.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Thai. From the place down the street you like, right?” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Ugh you’re the best. Why can’t you be gay? I’d totally marry you.” Kent opened up the first container and took a deep breath. “Fuck it, I’ll marry you anyway.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“It’s just thai food, don’t give up your new boyfriend that easily.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“He’s not my boyfriend. Come on, we don’t want anything to get cold. Including the tea.” He wiggled his eyebrows and they moved to watch their show on the couch together, yelling at the television almost as much as they would at a good hockey game. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>They ended up eating Choco Tacos for dessert, and Kent eventually sent a snapchat to Alexei of Jeff sleeping on the couch as they watched </span>
  <em>
    <span>How To Lose A Guy in 10 Days.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>
  <b>
    <em>Haha I will alert TMZ about NHL boyfriends ))))</em>
  </b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>
    <em>ur an ass :P</em>
  </b>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>
  <span>Jeff ended up sleeping in the spare room that night, and Kent fell asleep faster than ever in his own bed with Kit. </span>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>
  <span>______________________________</span>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>
  <span>Preseason started sooner than expected, every year it felt like no time passed before they were back in a packed rink, and he loved it more than anything. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Most days were exhausting, and he fell straight into bed as soon as he got home. He’d talked to Alexei before everything started and they both laughed over the way that life essentially shut down once hockey started again, so their texts slowed to one or two replies a day and Kent found himself okay with that. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Most nights he slept at Jeff’s or Jeff slept at his, purely because they found years ago that when they were exhausted it was easier to cook one meal for two than to feed themselves individually. Scraps would come over some days, and some of the other players would too.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>They’d go out for dinner some nights, and drinks after games, but other than that, Kent’s life had gone back into his little bubble that only got smaller when the season started, but he was okay with that. He was finally into a routine that worked. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He saw his therapist -- both mental and physical, each week, and everything was running smoothly. He watched Falconer’s games on the nights when their schedules didn’t clash, tucked comfortably in his bed under the guise of ‘watching tape’.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Christmas came and went, Tater came to stay for the three days they had off, kissing and drinking hot chocolate, curled up on the couch watching Love, Actually. They didn’t talk about it, the two of them dancing around it as they danced around one another one night after too many mulled wines, slowly swaying in each other’s arms through the living room. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Kent pulled his comforter tighter around his shoulders as he thought about that, watching the Falconer’s game from earlier that night. The Aces had won their game that was practically at the same time, and he came home buzzing. He chose to opt out of team drinks, just wanting to curl up in bed and watch the game. Everything was good. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The second period started, Alexei hitting the ice hard alongside Jack and skating well. They’d almost scored twice when he got into a rhythm with Jack, getting a pass that looked like it was about to become a goal when one of the defensemen came out of nowhere and slammed him into the boards. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Kent jumped up on his bed when it happened, watching Tater’s skates lift off the ice in the replays and knowing just how heavy he was, how much strength that would take. He watched Alexei’s body hit the ice hard, his head following in a hit to the ice that looked downright painful. Kent didn’t realise that he’d stopped breathing until Alexei stood to skate off the ice. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>There was no guarantee that it meant anything, really. Skating off was always more of a show to the fans that he was okay than anything else. Kent knew this, but it was still better than him being carried off. There seemed to be an agreement between the rest of the team that they weren’t going to fight, just play harder, just win. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Kent didn’t watch the rest of the game. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He switched to ESPN, hoping for news on Alexei’s condition as he opened his texts. His heart sunk as he realised that he hadn’t received anything since before they both started getting ready for their games.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>
    <em>just saw the game jfc are</em>
  </b>
</p><p>
  <b>
    <em>you okay????????? </em>
  </b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>
    <em>is there anything i can do?</em>
  </b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Kent pulled Kit close to his chest as he tried not to worry, rubbing his cheek against the top of her head as the news said that Alexei hadn’t returned to the ice and was rumoured to be out for a few games at least. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>
    <em>lex please txt me back</em>
  </b>
</p><p>
  <b>
    <em>when u can </em>
  </b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>
    <em>i’m really worried abt u </em>
  </b>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>
  <span>Forcing himself to put his phone down, he got out of bed and wandered to the kitchen. It’d been nearly six hours since the hit considering the timezone and Kent was freaking out. He put water into a pot on the stove, focusing on making himself a hot chocolate. His hands kept shaking, but he had control. It was okay, Alexei was strong. He could handle it, whatever it was. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Kit followed him into the kitchen and then back into his bed, curling up and kneading at the blankets until he finished his hot chocolate and brushed his teeth. Eventually the wear of playing a full game of hockey took over him and he fell asleep. </span>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  <span>He was wrenched out of his sleep when his phone started ringing halfway through the night. The bright screen forced him to squint so much that he could barely read the name </span>
  <em>
    <span>Alexei </span>
  </em>
  <span>as he hit answer. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hello?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Kent.” That got his attention and he was suddenly wide awake. He sat upright in his bed, desperately trying to get his bearings. Alexei was out of breath, he could tell from the shallow panting coming through the phone. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Lex. What’s happening are you okay?” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I am outside. I didn’t realise I would need code for your building.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Oh my god. Oh okay oh my god. I’ll text you.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Okay.” Alexei hung up and Kent jumped up, disturbing Kit who practically scowled at him as he threw all of the dirty clothes from his floor into his hamper. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He didn’t really care that he was only in his boxers and an old tshirt, more concerned with the mess around his apartment. He managed to move most of the old half-empty glasses of water to the kitchen by the time there was a knock on the door. He took a deep breath and opened it. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Alexei stood on the other side of the door, sweaty and out of breath and as beautiful as ever. He stepped forward and kicked the door closed, pulling Kent close and kissing him deeply. His eyes fell shut easily and he gripped onto Tater’s biceps, holding him close until he needed to suck in a breath and pulled back, realising all at once what was happening. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Wait. Why are you here? What happened on the ice? Are you hurt? Don’t you have to get back?” He knew that the other man couldn’t possibly answer all of the questions at the rate that he was asking them, but he couldn’t stop asking. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I am okay. Or, will be okay. Doctors said mild concussion and fractured rib that should heal itself as long as I am careful and keep getting it checked. Knee is okay, but might be weeks until I can play again.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Shouldn’t you be supporting the team from the bench? Is it too suspicious that you’re here? Your team needs you.” Alexei sat down on the arm of the couch as Kent moved in close, able to stand over him at this height as he fretted over his-- not his boyfriend. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You worry too much. Was suggested I skip a few games to not distract team, lay low for a while. I can go back whenever.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“If you’re sure. God, not that it isn’t nice to have you here. I feel like I’m dreaming.” Kent was running his fingers through Alexei’s hair, gentle because he knew that he had a head injury, but he didn’t want to stop. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I wanted to be here so bad.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“And now you are. Come to bed, it’s late. We can worry about everything else in the morning.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Okay.” Tater followed him to bed, greeting Kit with a big smile before going to brush his teeth. They got the extra pillows from the spare room and arranged them so that Alexei could sleep mostly sitting up as per the doctors’ instructions. Kent squeezed his hand and tangled their feet together before snuggling in and falling soundly asleep. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The day after a game, Kent always allowed himself a sleep-in, and today was no different. He woke at 7am, grinning when he saw that Alexei was still sleeping with Kit curled up at his feet. He turned off his own alarm and quietly walked to the kitchen, starting up a pot of coffee and making himself a bowl of oatmeal. He ate quietly, flicking through the news and reading through all of the articles claiming different things about Alexei’s health. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He got stressed very quickly, and instead switched to his instagram, sharing a few posts to his story and posting an old picture of Kit, before swiping to his feed and seeing a picture of Bittle and Zimms at the very top. His heart seized up in his chest for a second, but he breathed through it and liked the photo before continuing to scroll. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Once the oatmeal and coffee were both finished, Kent went to take a shower and get ready for the day. He typed out a text out to their GM, asking if they would be able to schedule a quick meeting after training and hit send before he could start to second-guess himself. Alexei was starting to wake up as he exited the bathroom, towel drying his hair and pulling on a shirt. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Oh hey, I didn’t mean to wake you. How are you feeling this morning?” Kent already had shorts on, not hesitating as he went around to the taller man’s side of the bed and leaned on it, running a hand down the side of his face. “I have training soon, d’you need anything?” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Good morning.” Alexei twisted to kiss Kent’s forehead and he could see him wince sharply. “Am okay, could you maybe get painkiller and water? Pills are in the front of my bag.” Kent mock-saluted, getting the pills out first and then going to the kitchen to fill a glass of water. His skin itched as the bottle stared at him from the counter, and he had to remind himself that he knew better than to even look at the label. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Here you go!” He brought the two things back to the room, along with a nutrition bar. “There’s coffee in the pot, and you’ve got my address and passcode if you want to order anything or go anywhere. How did you get my address by the way?” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Asked Jeff. Told him I wanted to send you gift as a surprise. I am not overstepping am I?” He visibly got nervous as if it was just dawning on him that he could’ve done something wrong. Kent found it adorable. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“No, god no that’s sweet. I’m so glad you’re here. Turns out you were the gift.” He grinned and checked the time on his alarm clock. “God, I want to stay but I’m going to be late if I spend any more time here. Have a good day, text me if you need anything at all okay?” He kissed Alexei one more time and grabbed his bag and other things, heading out of the door and straight down in the escalator to his building’s parking garage. </span>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>
  <span>_______________________________</span>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>
  <span>Training went smoothly, and even the energy in the locker room was pleasant, until he remembered that he had scheduled a meeting that was too late to back out of. He quickly toweled off and combed his hair, pulling on a nice enough outfit of jeans and a nice-fitting Aces t-shirt before heading through the building to the General Manager’s office. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The Aces GM was a stern-looking man named Todd, in his late 40’s and so skinny that you could bet any money he’d never played a single hockey game in his life. He was here for money and that was it. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Parson. Come in, have a seat. What was it you wanted to talk about?” He had his fingers laced together and sitting on the desk in front of him, looking like some kind of stern high school principal. Kent would’ve laughed at that realisation, but the gravity of the situation carried him across the room once he shut the door behind him and sat down in the chair to the right of the desk. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yes, I did. I know we’ve talked about this once before but I think I might be ready to come out in the next year or so.” He tried to keep his voice level, remembering the sessions he’d done with his therapist about asking for what he needed. He probably should’ve told her this before scheduling the meeting, but it was too late now. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Oh yes, the gay thing.” Todd typed something into the iMac that took up half of the space on his desk, before looking back up. “I felt like we were all very clear, Kent. We are okay with you being on the team, but it might be best if you keep your private life private. I’d support you, but I can’t ensure that the board or the other players would.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I just thought that, well, I'm older now, ready to settle down. I’ve proven myself as a player and a Captain, and I really don’t think there’s a better time.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Your contract is up at the end of this season, Parson. You can decide then what’s more important, having a little boyfriend or being captain of one of the best teams in the league. I’ve made my position clear and it’s completely up to you. Just remember all of the things they said about Zimmermann. All of the things he put his team through with that little stunt. Have a good day Kent.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yeah, okay thank you.” He looked into the smile on Todd’s face, wide with sharp teeth and dead eyes. All he could do was stand and walk out, not bearing to be in that room anymore, not with his eyes and cheeks starting to feel hot. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He wiped one of the tears that did spill as he was walking back to the locker room, the salt water hot and scorching his skin. He checked himself in the mirror and practiced a charming smile before he walked in to see all of the boys. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’m heading out guys, see you all tomorrow!” He picked up his bag with a smile, turning on his heel quickly and making a dash for his car as if he could outrun the worried looks on Jeff and Scraps’ faces. He needed space. He needed to think. He needed to not think and just be held. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He’d done the drive from the rink to his apartment so many times he could probably do it drunk blindfolded and naked, but today it felt like he couldn’t get home fast enough. The radio was playing some new pop song in the background, but his ears were ringing too loudly, his eyes were stinging with fresh hot tears. He all but ran to the elevator and sent a rare prayer to god when no one got in after him. </span>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  <span>He opened his apartment door to Alexei sitting on the couch watching something he didn’t care about. He could feel the tears spilling down his cheeks and considered fleeing to his room when the other man looked up at him. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Kent? You okay?” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I… Uh…” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Come sit. We don’t have to talk right now, just come sit.” He spread his arms and Kent slipped his shoes off, going straight to the couch and curling up into Alexei’s side. He was careful not to lean too heavily, not wanting to hurt him, but Alexei just rubbed his back and let him watch television quietly, the hot tears flowing freely down his cheeks until they slowly stopped and started to cool off. He raised a hand to his cheek to wipe them off, and got a gentle kiss to the top of his head for his effort. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I talked to our manager about the possibility of coming out.” He sniffled, rubbing his eye with his free hand. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Oh?” Alexei muted the television and resumed the slow circles he was stroking into Kent’s back, just waiting for him to speak when he was ready. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“He pretty much said that I can do what I want but they’re not going to have my back.” A bitter laugh came from deep in his chest. “I’m the captain. I’m a good player. He threw Zimms back in my face, essentially said that I’d be putting everyone through hell. Who cares what I go through though, right?” He went to rub at his eye again but diverted his hand, running it up through his hair. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“He’s an idiot.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“He’s right though, in a way. I’m not Jack.” He could feel Alexei about to object, and shook his head slightly. “I know I’ve got every right to be myself, I deserve it. And young queer people deserve it too, fuck the league. But Jack… He’s the hockey robot. Fans want a masculine guy who just so happens to be gay. I know it’s not easy for him, and you guys have been so great, but I’m still the party boy. I’m the twink he’s the jock.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Alexei was quiet for a moment. “He’s not right. Yes, maybe is different. But you know the league, it’s your career. Swoops and your Aces friends would have your back, no? The world is changing, Kent Parson, and you should be allowed to be happy. Twink or no.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I don’t know they all would. I’m their Captain of course, and most of the younger guys would have my back but… the older guys said some awful things about Jack. And I think some of the younger guys are just happy to stay out of it because it doesn’t affect them right now.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Oh. Well, we take it a day at a time. If you want to come out, I will be right here. If you want to wait, we can figure out what that means when you are ready. No pressure.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yeah I guess you’re right.” Kent moved to his knees, placing a kiss to Alexei’s temple. “Time for food.” He grabbed his phone and sent a text to his assistant, or at least one of the team assistants, asking her to move all of his commitments to the next day. </span>
  <em>
    <span>I’m Sick. :-( </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He wasn’t convincing her, but as he started to make grilled cheese for himself and the beautiful man moving slowly into his kitchen, he really didn’t care. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>They spent the afternoon making out and watching movies, Kent helping Alexei to ice and re-strap his ribs. They ate takeout and watched old tape.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He went to work the next day and kept his head down, knowing he just had to pretend that their conversation never happened and move on for now. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Things you can’t control. </span>
  </em>
  <span>His old therapist’s voice echoed in his head as he sat in the locker room and let everyone’s voices overlap around him.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Swoops had already been updated on the fact that Alexei was at Kent’s, and invited himself over for lunch. They had a surprisingly fun time, teasing each other and bonding over their mutual love of shitty reality tv. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Kent had to leave in the morning for an away game and though the game itself was nothing special, it was really nice to know that Alexei would be at home waiting for him when he got back. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He’d never admit it, and he was trying not to get used to it, but the snapchats he got of Kit while he was away definitely made him cry at least twice. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>They were in the car home, Swoops driving himself and Kent as per their away game tradition, while Kent opened the snapchats that he’d been sent while they were on the plane and grinning to himself. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“So are you two like, a thing, now?” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“What?” Kent looked up at him, surprised that Swoops was even paying attention. “Keep your eyes on the road.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Oh come on, I don’t even have to look at you to know you have that stupid smile on your face.” Jeff shook his head and reached in front of him to turn the music down. “Answer my question.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I don’t know, we haven’t talked about it. It doesn’t really matter, we’re just going with the flow.” That wasn’t entirely true, Kent was just too afraid to make any kind of move. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Of course, Jeff Troy could read Kent’s mind. “Talk to him about it. I’d be shocked if that boy isn’t already head over heels for you but you need to have the conversation. So you both know.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yeah I know. You’re right, it’s just…” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“It’s always complicated isn’t it?” Swoops smiled softly at him, his eyes softening.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I guess so. I need to put my cards on the table. All of them.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’m proud of you, Kent.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>And that was that. </span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0008"><h2>8. Chapter Eight</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Warnings for discussion of addiction and substance abuse! </p><p>The boys are finally starting to figure it all out. </p><p>Also there's probably one or two more chapters after this one ! go figure</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Swoops dropped him at his front door and let him get his bag out of the back seat, leaning over the seat to ruffle his hair while he did so. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I expect full updates.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yeah, whatever.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Good luck.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Kent stood up and closed the door and Jeff drove off, leaving him to walk into his building alone. He got into the elevator in the lobby and rubbed his eye as it went up, the silence suddenly disarming. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The doors opened and he made his way to his apartment, unlocking the door himself and walking in. He wasn’t sure whether to knock, it was his place after all, but he could tell Alexei was there from the music playing quietly from behind the door. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Kit was there immediately, and he sat down once the door was closed behind him to say hello to her, letting her rub her face against his and laughing when she started to pur. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Kent! You’re here!” Alexei came into the room as quickly as he could considering his injury, a big smile on his face. He’d intended to talk immediately, but getting pulled into a hug and led to the kitchen to see his kitchen had exploded into Russian baked goods seemed more important. </span>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>
  <span>_______________________________</span>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>
  <span>“What is this?” Kent finally asked a few hours later, once they’d eaten their share of sweets and he’d had a shower, feeling fresh and ready to just lounge around on the couch together. They were trying to decide on something to watch, his feet up on Alexei’s lap as the taller man was rubbing circles into his ankle with his thumb. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“What is what?” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“This. Us. I know I’m asking early but…” He sighed and shifted, tucking his legs under him so that he could properly turn so they faced each other. “I just think, we’re both on the road all the time, we live on opposite ends of the country. What are we doing?” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I don’t know.” Kent felt his heart sink at the admission, knowing he’d made some kind of mistake. He was about to get up and leave when Alexei kept talking. “I like you a lot, and I do not have the answers right now, but we both are hockey players, yes? We both know what it is like to travel.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yeah, but how do we know that it’s not going to suck with us both traveling all the time?” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I cannot promise it won’t. But we can try? That is all we can ever do.” Alexei pulled Kent into his lap and he moved easily. “There is video chat. Jack and Little B do that, and we have money to fly whenever we want. If you want to try, I want to.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yeah. I want to.” He leaned down to kiss him gently, happy to know they were on the same page. “But uh, speaking of them, did you tell Jack already?” He started picturing all of the ways he could react, and then all the ways this could all go wrong, no matter how hard he tried to stop them. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“No I haven’t. Didn’t see them after we went in garage last night.” He kissed Kent on the top of his head. “And like you said, complicated.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Okay. Yeah.” Kent rubbed at his eye. “Can I talk to him about it? I want to explain everything to you so… Y’know you get a chance to run for the hills. But it’s not entirely my story to tell.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I understand. He tells me about the draft when he first became a Falconer. Anxiety medication. You went to the draft and he went to rehab.” He was serious, really serious for the first time Kent had ever seen. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Okay, yeah. Well, the part that he probably didn’t tell you was that I was there. Those rumours, well most of them are true. Jack wasn’t the addict, that was me.” Tater just sat, listening as Kent tried to regain his breathing. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You don’t have to tell me all now. I don’t mind.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“No, I… I want to tell you now.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Okay.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“The draft was hard. Jack, he didn’t want to talk to me after everything happened. I don’t blame him, really. But I went to Vegas because that was all I knew how to do. I went, and I was surrounded by the bright lights and the new experiences, and more money than I’d ever seen in my life. So I partied, and that took my mind off how scared I was.” A bitter laugh wrenched itself from his chest. “God I was so scared. I’d just had my heart broken for the first time and then I was given the world on a platter. I guess he expected me to say no? I don’t know what he expected really, but I just did what was easy. I don’t remember a lot of it. I learned when to stop so that my tests were clear, I knew what left fastest.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“And then I saw Jack’s name in the news again. He was almost out of school, teams were talking about him. I was captain of The Aces because no matter what I knew how to pull it together, how to play. I went to his school to talk to him.” He sat back and shook his head. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I don’t know why I did it. I suppose part of me thought that if he just came back and played, we could be a team again. Everything would go back to how it was, or whatever. I asked him to come to The Aces and he said no. I don’t think it was the refusal that did it, I think it was the fact that he wasn’t the guy I knew anymore and I was just so angry. I was angry that I had everything he wanted and he was the one who seemed happier.” Kent was shaking now, he knew that whatever this was between them was probably over, but he needed to tell someone. He needed to tell Alexei. He felt the other man’s hand on his waist, his thumb rubbing slow circles again, but it was different this time. It was comforting, grounding. It gave him the time to continue. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“A lot of people say that addicts like to bring down the people around them. I don’t know if that’s true, but maybe it is. All I know is I said things that I can never take back. I wanted to know that I meant anything at all to him, and I will regret that for the rest of my life. I slept in my car that night, and I guess that was rock bottom. I could only really go up from there.” He saw, rather than felt, a tear fall and hit his own hand and reached up to swipe any others away. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I get that you probably don’t want to talk to me anymore, or you need time to think about it. But I think it’s fair for you to know. I’m sober now. I see a therapist and I take medication, but I’ve only just started drinking at parties again. I’m still trying to figure out who I am, but I think I’m finally on the right path and I really do like you. I want to make this work, but I need you to know that I’m not that person anymore, but that doesn’t mean that I never was.” He wasn’t sure when he’d moved out of Alexei’s lap, but he sat on the couch beside him for what felt like an eternity in silence. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Thank you for telling me. I meant it when I said last night. You are a good man, Kent.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“But--” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I know. That does not change what happened and we could talk about that for a long time, but you said it yourself. You are not that person. Jack has forgiven you and I think you have forgiven him. That is all there is to know.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You’re too good. You know that, right?” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I have stories too, I can tell you if you want.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“One day. Right now, can we watch a movie?” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yes of course. Anything you want.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“27 Dresses?” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Sitting together on the couch, Kent’s back pressed to Alexei’s chest and an arm over his waist, he felt like he could breathe for the first time in years. They critiqued the dresses and sang along to Bennie and the Jets, and he felt more than settled. He felt solid. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The credits rolled and he may or may not have had to wipe a tear from the corner of his eye before he carefully turned in Alexei’s arms. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hi.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You have freckles.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I do.” Alexei’s hand came up to trace the bridge of his nose, and his lips followed, making Kent scrunch it up. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Very small. Just like you.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You’re just a goon.” Kent laughed and lifted his hand to push a loose curl out of Alexei’s face, kissing him gently. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You’re a sneaky rat.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I was hoping you wouldn’t remember that.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I never forget. But is okay, as long as you do not get hurt.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You’re the one who lifted me by my jersey!” Kent rolled to lay on top of him, jabbing a finger into his chest accusingly. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“And I will do it again if you are a rat.” He kissed him before he had the chance to say anything to that, and Kent just fell into it. It was quickly becoming his favourite thing to do. He didn’t know how long they kissed, just enjoying being in each other’s space. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“It’s still weird that you’re here with me.” He sighed and headbutted Alexei’s chest, and if he let his hands slide up to brace himself, that fact stayed between him and his hands. And Alexei’s rumbling laugh. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Maybe I don’t leave. Stay here and be Aces mascot.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You’d miss hockey too much.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You make a good point. But I have the thighs for it I think.” Kent felt his face heat and he shook his head through a laugh. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’ll just have to keep getting you injured so you can stay for a few weeks every season.” Alexei kissed him again and they sat up, their legs still tangled together. “I, uh, I was thinking about texting Jack though. I wanted to talk to him, maybe tell him? About us?” He laced their fingers together and kissed Alexei’s knuckles. “I don’t have to, I just… I don’t want you to have to keep it from him.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Tell him, is okay. I’m not letting you get away Kent Parson.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I just don’t know when I’ll be able to see him next, I’m not particularly good at texting or even Skype.” He couldn’t stop running his hands through Tater’s hair. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You are good with me, I enjoyed video chats and seeing your face.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I guess. I was just thinking, if you need to go back maybe I can come with you? Or wait until we have a game in Providence. Maybe Boston is sooner.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“We have all the time in the world. Whenever you are ready, but I would like that.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Okay. In the meantime, I think we need to eat more of those desserts.” He wriggled out of Tater’s grip and made a break for the kitchen. He knew his nutritionists would be mad at him tomorrow, but he really couldn’t find it in himself to care, taking bites out of Alexei’s hand and sitting on the counter so that he could steal eye-level kisses. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He remembered to send a text to Swoops before they went to bed, noting the strange arrangement of pillows Alexei had set up to sleep comfortably. It was nice to be reminded that he wasn’t alone anymore. He smiled at the second toothbrush next to his and sighed happily at the new array of shampoos and conditioners in his shower before he climbed into bed, giving Alexei one last kiss before they both drifted off. </span>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>
  <b>
    <em>Swoops :P</em>
  </b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>
    <em>oh btw i have a bf now</em>
  </b>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>;*</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>
    <em>you’re ridiculous i told u so</em>
  </b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>
    <em>happy for u though &lt;3 </em>
  </b>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0009"><h2>9. Chapter Nine</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Kent was pacing around his apartment. He had planned a dinner. He had planned a dinner with Alexei and Jeff and he was going to combust. The food was in the oven, and the table was set and he’d checked his hair thirty times and he just knew that if he checked it again he was going to lose his mind. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The season had just ended, neither the Aces nor the Falconers had made it to the final, but Alexei had gone back to support the team for a while and Kent had fought hard. For once he knew that, and that was kind of the point of this whole dinner. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He checked on the food instead of checking his hair, and that was when he heard a knock on the door. He rushed to open it with Kit close behind him, the heavy wood swinging open to reveal his boyfriend, fresh off a plane with his overnight bag and a wide face-splitting grin. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Kent!” He shut the door quickly so that Alexei could pull him into a deep kiss, melting his bones and causing him to grip his shoulders as Alexei licked into his mouth and turned him into jelly. He managed to pull back before it escalated too quickly, taking Alexei’s bag and putting it down in his own room whilst his boyfriend was distracted by Kit. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Smells very good K!” He walked back into the main room and was pulled into another hug from Alexei which he returned eagerly.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Are you smelling my hair?” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“It is not my fault you are short.” He slapped Alexei’s chest gently for that and was rewarded with a light chuckle. “I missed you.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I missed you too.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The next knock on the door made Kent dislodge himself from his giant boyfriend and make his way to the door where he already knew Jeff was on the other side. He got a hug, and then Alexei got a hug, and before he knew it they were all sitting down to eat with glasses of wine and big smiles. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“So why’d you call us here on such short notice, Parse? Is something wrong?” Kent opened his mouth to answer but naturally Jeff wasn’t finished speaking so he just closed his mouth again as his best friend continued. “You don’t have to tell us right away of course, whenever you’re ready.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Might as well just rip the band-aid off.</span>
  </em>
  <span> Kent finds himself thinking, though he’s already speaking. “Uh, so I… Uh, I got offered a trade.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Their reactions are simultaneous, both of them frowned in confusion, then their faces broke out into grins, and then they both just gave Kent that hollow smile that meant they weren’t sure what the right response was. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I haven’t decided if I want it yet. My contract’s just about up, everyone knows that. I’ve talked to a lot of people and I don’t want to leave the Aces or completely uproot my life, but I’m never going to be able to come out while I’m with them, hell I don’t know if I’ll even be protected by them anymore. So I wanted to talk to you guys about it. I trust you both.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Oh. Uh, okay. Where’s the trade to?” Swoops was already digging into his food, filling his mouth as soon as he was finished with his question. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’ve gotten a few offers, but the ones that seem best are the Schooners and the Bruins.” He sighed and took a long sip of his wine. I might get more offers soon but I think maybe an established team might be best for me career wise? Boston is just so far away.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Kent didn’t have to say it, he knew they were all thinking it, and luckily Alexei changed the subject. “Have you asked about coming out?” He spoke up for the first time, and Kent didn’t look up. He wasn’t sure what the expression was on Alexei’s face, but he knew he was nervous to see it. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Not, uh, not specifically but I asked about diversity and their You Can Play participation and they seemed to be pretty genuine. I’ll uh, I’ll ask before I sign anything official of course I just don’t want to risk outing myself to a team I’m not joining.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Alexei looped his ankle around Kent’s under the table and he looked up to see the warm smile on his face. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Whatever you decide, I’ve got your back.” Jeff said before stuffing his face again, either oblivious or not caring about the moment Kent was sharing with his boyfriend. “We’ll always see each other no matter what, we have the money for flights and endless skype calls.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’m not letting you get away that easily.” He laughed and they moved onto a conversation about some ridiculous thing Katy Perry shared on her instagram story and Kent thought, maybe this is what it’s like to be loved unconditionally. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Alexei and Jeff kept talking about some show Kent hadn’t seen and he watched them, thinking about a video call he’d had with Jack when Alexei was staying the first time. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>He’d been so nervous, and Tater had chosen to sit in a different room to give Kent space to talk to him, but when Jack’s face appeared on his screen he had that same feeling he’d gotten all of those years since they stopped speaking. That mix of anxiety and joy, fear and peace. He didn’t really know what it meant anymore, but it was starting to mellow out. Eric had passed in the background and Kent greeted him too, and he blushed like he’d been caught doing something wrong. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“I’ll leave to give you boys some space, sorry.” He knew that Eric still didn’t like him, but he had a feeling he was slowly breaking through. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Actually, stay. This kind of involves you too.” Kent’s thumb tapped against the edge of his laptop, a habit he’d had since he was a child and didn’t know how to stop. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Oh.” Eric sat on the sofa next to Jack, clearly not sure what to do now. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“What’s up?” Jack asked, shifting the laptop so that there was a clearer view of both him and Eric in their living room. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“So I haven’t been completely honest with you guys.” </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“If this is about that party--” </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“No it’s not.” Kent wasn’t sure which part of the party Tater had thrown Jack was referring to, but he knew he didn’t want to talk about those things. “Well, maybe it is, but not the part that you think.” </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Eric raised one eyebrow and Jack’s brow furrowed, almost in sync. It made Kent laugh shallowly. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“I’m not dating Jeff.” </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Oh?” They both spoke in unison too, and it was getting less cute. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“I didn’t want to come to your engagement alone, so he offered. And I probably wouldn’t be telling you this, but I kind of met someone else and I thought you should know.” </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“You know you don’t have to tell us about everything,” Eric started, but Kent cut him off. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“It’s Alexei.” </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Who?” Kent had to hold in another laugh at the way Eric’s jaw dropped. Jack stayed weirdly silent. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Mashkov? I thought you guys were pretty close.” </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“I’m going to need a minute to process this.” </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Jack?” Kent looked to his ex through the screen, trying to gauge his reaction. He had just started this new friendship with Jack, and didn’t want to ruin it all over again. Or worse, ruin Jack’s relationship with Alexei. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Makes sense. Thanks for telling us.” </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“You’re not surprised?” Eric’s head whipped around so fast that Kent thought he was going to hurt himself. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“No. Alexei has liked him for a long time, and He’s Kenny’s type.” </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>A loud laugh bubbled out of Kent at that. “You are an ass Jack Zimmermann.” </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“I’m just… I need a minute.” Eric repeated himself, rubbing a hand down the side of his face. “Please Kent, explain to me how this happened.”</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>So he did. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>They were silent the whole time, Jack smiling at certain parts and Eric looking more and more confused. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“It’s new, I know. I just… I want to do this right, I told him everything, and I wanted you guys to know too. If it’s weird, or anything, please tell me. I want to be able to talk about this. He’s your friend too, you guys work together.” Kent stuffed his hands in his pockets and forced his shoulders to relax in the hopes that the knot in his chest would follow suit. It didn’t. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Jack put a hand on Eric’s knee when he finished. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“I’m happy for the two of you, really. It’s not weird. I just… I need you to know it’s going to be hard. Hiding Eric from the world, especially when we first started to date. And even now traveling constantly for hockey…” Jack sighed, “it’s going to be hard for both of you. But I think you can do it.” </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Kent wasn’t expecting the last confession and tried not to gape too openly at Jack. “Thank you. I know it’s going to be hard with… Everything. But I figured it’s better to try and fail than to always wonder. I trust him and I feel like I can talk to him…” He noticed Eric and Jack were looking at him with matching amused expressions. “What?” </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Oh it’s nothing just, y’all hockey players never do things by halves do you?” </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Not that I’ve ever seen. He’s uh, he’s staying here at the moment while he recovers.” Kent laughed, knowing that Jack and Eric had been given vague responses whenever they asked where Tater was staying. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Oh my god. Is he there now? Tater!!!” Bitty yelled through his computer screen and Kent laughed, getting up to open his bedroom door and find Alexei sitting watching the television. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Uh, Lexei did you want to come say hi?” He didn’t miss the whispered ‘Lexei????’ From Eric, and laughed softly as his boyfriend turned off the television and came to sit in front of the computer with him. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Little B! Zimmboni! Everything good?” </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Hey Tater! Yeah everything is good, I just… Did not expect this at all.” Eric laughed, clearly still trying to wrap his head around everything he’d just learned. “So this is the hot blonde you’re staying with?” </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Hot blonde?” Kent turned his head to look at Alexei. “Is this how you’re describing me?” </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Hush.” The tips of Tater’s ears had turned pink and Kent bumped him with his shoulder, grinning. They talked for a while, mostly Eric and Alexei catching up on everything while Kent and Jack listened and laughed along. Eventually Eric had to go get something out of the oven and Tater told Kent that he had to take a phone call, kissing him on the top of the head and leaving just Kent and Jack alone. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Are you really okay with all of this?” Kent asked, seeing his own brow furrowed in the small window on his computer. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span> “Yeah of course I am. You deserve to be happy, I know you are. Like I said, it might be hard but you’ll get through it and we’ve got your back.” Kent nodded, running a hand through his hair. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Thank you, Zimms. Really it means a lot.” </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“By the way, I’m really proud of how you handled that night. I know I wasn’t really there but Shitty… He didn’t tell me exactly what happened but he told me that you were really mature about it all. You’re doing great Kenny.” </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Thanks. I know it wasn’t good for you, me being around with all of that. You weren’t around for the worst of it, and I’m always going to be grateful for that but… I’m okay now. I can see a future for once.” </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Me too. Could you imagine what our teenage selves would think if they saw us now?” </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“I don’t want to know.” They laughed and eventually hung up, and Kent went out to sit on the couch with Alexei, curling into his side and feeling fingers come up and rub circles into his scalp until he relaxed. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>
  <span>Kent thought about that irony now, in the same position on the couch after they had finished eating and Jeff had gone home, with another promise that they’d be best friends no matter what and a confirmation that he’d help look over the contracts. Alexei hadn’t said much, they mostly sat in silence just enjoying one another’s company for the first time in a short while. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“If I go with Boston we’ll be able to have nights like this all the time.” He said softly. They hadn’t really talked about this aspect of it all, but he knew it was on both of their minds. He knew Jeff was thinking about it too. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You do not have to make your decision for me.” Tater said quietly. “But yes. It would be nice.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’ll probably have to work my way back up to captain again. Ch</span>
  <span>ára won’t last long, but I doubt they’ll choose me over Bergeron.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Does that matter? Less pressure, let you be your own person.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You’re right. I needed to be captain for the Aces. I needed to prove myself. Now…” He looked up at Tater, the way that the light hit his face and the way his hair curled at the back of his neck. “Now I just want to play hockey. To be myself and play hockey.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You just have to pick wherever that will make you happy. Whatever that means we will be okay. You and Jeff will be okay. We are in your corner.” He pressed a kiss to the top of Kent’s head and turned to get the television remote. “What movie tonight?” </span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Second last chapter! Thank you all for your support and kind words, this was honestly a fix-it-fic for myself considering the way Kent's arc finished, but I hope it was enjoyable for you too. I love these boys in case it wasn't obvious, and I would do anything to make sure they're happy.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0010"><h2>10. Chapter Ten</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>“Lex! Did you already pack my toothbrush?” Kent was still trying to get ready as his boyfriend frantically packed boxes. Sure, he probably should’ve finished packing weeks ago, but there was no point counting up all of the things he hadn’t done. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Is in the top of your backpack! Wasn’t sure if you had brushed but didn’t want it to go too far!” Kent reached into the bag that he had packed to take in the car with him and grinned triumphantly when he felt the solid plastic. He quickly brushed his teeth and put it back in its place before going to help Alexei with the last of his things. He was trying not to take note of the empty apartment, trying not to notice it until he absolutely had to. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>They’d settled on Boston. It was the obvious choice, but it still took some considering and negotiating. Kent came out shortly after the trade announcement, something they decided on as a team to get some more publicity but also to avoid two separate rounds of paparazzi hounding him. The response was mostly positive, and there were naturally some homophobes, but Kent didn’t really pay them any mind. He never had and he wasn’t going to start now. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Most people had figured out that he was dating Alexei by now, but they weren’t ready to confirm anything just yet. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Kent wanted to deal with the stress of moving to the other side of the country first. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Promise you’ll call every day?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Promise. We have so much reality tv to keep up with we’ll never lose contact. You’re not getting away that easily.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Jeff was captain now. Kent wanted to say that he’d pulled some strings and given this as a going away gift, but he didn’t need to. He always said that Jeff was better than him, and he was talented enough in his own right to get the C. He had a new girlfriend who seemed amazing, and strangely enough Kent didn’t feel like he was leaving his best friend behind. He knew they'd be okay. At least this time he gets to say goodbye. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Before he knew it, the van was packed up and the apartment was empty. Kit was in her carrier and they had done all of their research into relocating to make it as easy on her as possible. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>It was time. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He took one last look around the space, partially to make sure he hadn’t missed anything and partially to say goodbye. Not all of his memories of this place were good, but they were important anyway. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Kent and Alexei had decided on hiring a moving service for his furniture and clothes, and then flying themselves and Kit over with the basics for the few days before everything arrived in Boston. They considered a road trip but driving across the country just seemed too stressful. Kent had a few offers to stay with his new teammates until he got his new apartment settled but he was actually really excited to stay with Alexei for the next few days. Naturally, he got off the plane with Kit and his boyfriend to a hoard of reporters ready to take photos of him and make grand assumptions about their relationship, but he had covered Kit’s crate for that very reason and they were both well-versed by their PR teams. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Getting back to Alexei’s apartment was a dream though, he had only been once or twice, but the whole place felt homier than his own, and he let Kit out once they got settled. She was less worried than he thought she’d be, but he knew that was probably because she was already familiar with the owner. Kit ran off to explore and Kent slumped down onto the couch with his boyfriend, resting his head on his chest. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“That was exhausting.”</span>
  <span></span>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>
  <span>“Unpacking will be--” Kent cut him off with a hand over his face. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“We are not talking about that for the next three days. For now, we rest. And shower I feel gross. What are you looking at me like that for? Oh. Yes, you can shower with me.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>A very thorough shower and four boxes of Thai food later, they were curled up together on the couch with Kit when there was a knock at the door. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You better not be having sex, we’re coming in!” The door was already swinging open before either of them reacted, and Kent frowned up at Alexei. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I gave them key a long time ago, did not realise they would use it this often.” The pair got up and padded to the entryway where Bitty was holding several pie boxes and Jack was carrying a box in a different shape that was definitely still baked goods. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hey guys, glad to see you’re letting yourselves in now.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hush! I brought ‘Welcome to the East Coast’ baked goods, they’re not as good as the ‘Welcome to Rhode Island’ baked goods you would’ve gotten as a Falconer, but they’re pretty good.” Kent ruffled Bitty’s hair with a laugh and took the boxes off of him, carrying them to the kitchen and putting them onto the counter. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Thank you, I appreciate you trying to fatten me up and slow me down for the Bruins. Though I think bringing them here just means that Tater will eat them before I get a chance.” He slapped his boyfriend’s hand away from the boxes without even looking at him. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Ow! Kent, they are for sharing.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Get everyone drinks and I’ll serve up the pie.” He leaned behind him to press a kiss to the part of Alexei’s jaw he could reach. “Hey Bitty, which pie should we dig into together? And which box is it in?” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“There’s an apple maple that the boys love that’s usually best when it’s still a bit warm, third box down I think.” Kent followed his instruction and found it, starting to serve everything up. Somehow Bitty managed to produce whipped cream and ice-cream from thin air, and topped off everyone’s bowls with a smile. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The four of them sat down on the couch to watch the Mighty Ducks together, Jack complaining about plot holes and the rest of them teasing him in return. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Kent settled back against Alexei’s chest and felt it vibrate against his spine with his warm laughter, making eye contact with Jack and grinning at him. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Jack tilted his head in a silent question, and Kent shook his own in return. Bitty rolled his eyes at them good-naturedly, before he got up and asked if anyone wanted more pie.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Starting in a new team was going to be hard, moving across the country was going to be hard. Life wasn’t magically easy all of a sudden, but for once he was surrounded by the people who made him the happiest and he knew that as long as he had this, he was going to be okay. </span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Thank you for reading &lt;3</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
</body>
</html>